chapter 1

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She was sweating... Her eyes were tightly closed..  She clenched the bedsheet and tears were dropping from her eyes. She found it difficult to breathe. She woke up in a jerk. She took a moment to realize that it was just a dream...

When she opened her eyes, she saw the light was still on and the fan was running at full speed.. Slowly moving from the bed, she reached to take the bottle and sipped some water...

Sana thought..

Aah.. It's 2 only... Anyway It's better than the last night.. I managed to sleep continuously for 3 hours.. Now try to get some more sleep

She kept her phone aside and closed her while clenching her pillow.

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Shehnaaz, who is also known as Sana, is a 25 year old lady from Bangalore. She still finds it difficult to sleep alone, so she always keeps the lights on and tightly hugs her pillow to feel she is protected. It has been a week since she has moved to Mumbai. Her family is in Banglore. She has her parents and a sister, who got married last year.

Both the young ladies were against arranged marriage. But Sheena, the elder one got married last year, of course arranged, to a professor in Banglore Govt. City College. Sheena tried all her ways to delay her marriage till she reached 28 yrs. Her last reason also got over as she got a job as assistant professor in NIT,  Banglore. For her luck, Aman was a nice man and treated her nicely.

Even though their family was a little liberal, but their parents wanted their children to get married before their suitable age gets over. They never forced it on their children, but they were always worried. Both the children wanted to experience a love story in their life, but they could find any. Both had a lot of one side love stories ( not the true love stuff) , but never shown courage to tell it to the other person.

When Sheena always followed what her parents told her, Shehnaaz was always a rebel. She was never clear about her passion or dreams, but she never wanted to leave a normal life. She never followed same pattern in her life more than a month,  may be she was never satisfied with any of her patterns. She was a little chubby. She wanted to reduce some weight, especially her belly,  to wear her favorite dresses. But she never worked for it as she felt it was boring to do exercises. She had done aerobics, zumba, yoga and some other YouTube exercises, but nothing continued more than a week. She got bored so easily.

In all cases she got bored so easily, so she was so eager to find out her passion. Yeah!  For many, it may find stupid. But, that's what most of the people in the world face. Most of us don't know our passion and finally gets adjusted to whatever we get. But she never wanted to adjust.

She quited her job because she felt bored, she changed schools because she felt bored. Her uncertainty in everything has always bothered her parents.

As she was jobless now and was at the suitable age of marriage, her relatives started to compel her parents to get her married. She didn't knew what to do. She had no career goal which she had to achieve like her sister, nor any love affairs. She really wanted to explore more in her life, find her passion and then fall in love with the most suitable guy. You know, the imperfect guy who will love her perfectly... 😉

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What do you really want to do baby??  Tell us so that we can support you. 

Rajeev, Shehnaaz's father, tried to pacify her after her quarrel with her mother, Raveena.

I don't know dad, but I want to do something which will make me happy, not for a huge sum of money at the end of every month

I understand you... But, what's your dream?  You were always a brilliant student in school and college. Apply for some big jobs in service field too and I am sure you can make it...

It's not about that dad.. I really don't know what I want. I don't want to regret later after getting a high class job. I don't think it's my area.

If you don't know anything, then what do you want us to do.. We may live for a few more years.. What will you do after that? You know that we don't have much savings.. You can live only if you do a job.. So first get a good job.. May be everyone aren't meant to follow their passion.. See us.. We didn't chose our job because it was our passion,  we need to adjust sometimes baby...

Why are you wasting your time Rajeev? It's of no use.. Either she get ready to concentrate on getting a job in any PSU or else we are getting her married.. She has no idea what she is doing to herself.. We can't leave our child to beg on the streets.

Raveena shouted. She don't know know how to make her daughter understand about the real world. The real world is not just about dreams. It lies outside the dreams, infront of our eyes. If they die, there won't be anyone to take care of Sana. She will be left alone with no money. It was important to get a job and get married to a gentleman as soon as possible, so that they can die peacefully.

I will think about it dad...  Give me sometime... Sana replied with almost teary eyes.

We don't want to force anything on you baby.. It's for your better future only..

With that her parents left the room

After a few hours her phone ringed. It was Sheena on the other side. She understood what Shehnaaz was going through. She had also faced that, but never voiced it like Shehnaaz. Atleast, Shehnaaz has the courage to stand up for herself, Sheena thought.

Sheena, I think, I have to move from here.. I need to spend some time for myself and to explore myself.. I can't adjust through out my life and fake my happiness

Are you kidding!! You can't properly sleep in a room alone at night and you are talking about moving from here...  Just talk sense Sana!!!

I know it will be difficult without you all.. But I wanna try it. Else I won't be able to stand up myself and be happy.. Mom and dad won't agree.. So .... you have to help me.

Even I don't agree Sana!! .... It hurts to say but don't be so adamant. You don't have a dream or passion till now. So, you need to try something which comes in your way. You can easily get a job in PSU, if you work hard for a year.  I will sent you to one of the best coaching centres. You will be happy baby, try it.. Everything won't happens as in movies. Come out of your la la land.

Plzz help me Sheena, I am asking for a last chance.. I don't think I can make it from here. I need to get out of my cocoon and give a chance to myself. I ......I want to go to Mumbai..

What the hell??  Mumbai!!!!.. So are you going to try in Bollywood or something?? You are literally mad!!

Do you really think that??  Ooh!!  Do you think someone who looks like me get a chance to be atleast a lightboy in film industry.. I just need time and I think Mumbai can give more exposure to find my talent......even if ...I don't know my talent. Ok???

You are mad, that's it..we will talk tomorrow. I know by morning you will get another ideas too as always and drop this one.. Sheena smiled sarcastically. Indeed, every time when Sana planned anything, she had dropped it after a day. So, she believed it will be also like that.

But, this time it was a little different. Shehnaaz was stubborn about her decision and atlast everyone surrendered.

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It's my first try..  If you like it plz vote comment and share with your friends.. Welcome for any suggestions too

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