The Inconsistency of Nothingness

Everything to Me

"Clay, I think they're finally ready to talk. Maybe just give them a chance," Nick tried.

"I just... I don't think I'm ready to forgive," Clay said softly. Clay always felt vulnerable talking about his feelings, but he knew he needed to do it for the sake of his friends. He promised he would.

"It's okay to not want to forgive, but I think you should at least listen to what they have to say," George said carefully. "What they did was really fucked up, and you have every right to still be upset."

Clay sighed. "Every time I see their contact pop on my phone, I feel so angry. I hate that I am stuck with that memory," Dream sighed. "There's not much I can do about that now." Dream said as the van pulled up to their studio. He hopped out of the car, and the three other boys followed behind him silently.

The recording went smoothly as always, but the mood in the air was a little dreary from the talk earlier. After they finished, they all went their separate ways to go and cool off from the hard work. As George walked up to the vending machine to grab a soda, he saw Nick sitting at the bench cradling a sprite. He looked deep in thought.

"Hey dude, what's on your mind," George asked as he popped the quarters into the machine.

Nick looked up. "Do you think Clay's parents hated him?"

"No way, why would they try reaching out to him if they did?" George grabbed his soda and sat down next to Nick.

"No, I mean... Did they hate him when they kicked him out? How can you do that to your own kid unless you hated them? I mean, let's be real. If your kid was skipping school, sure you'd be pissed, but how the fuck could you just throw them out onto the street. He was 15 at the time, he was still a kid."

"I- I don't know, Nick. I really don't know."

Clay did not live an easy life, but then again, his naturally rebellious and stubborn nature didn't really help. His parents weren't very wealthy, but they were able to live well enough. Both of his parents worked to make a living so that Dream would be able to attend college. His parents both had humble jobs, but they expected Clay to do well in school and constantly stressed the importance of studying something lucrative enough to bring in the big bucks. His dad had an expensive habit of drinking, and often spent his paycheck on drinks. The only problem was that Clay hated going to school. George remembered how Clay would constantly "use the bathroom" during class to just fuck around outside.

Once Clay made it to high school, he completely stopped going to classes as an act of defiance. He would run to his little spot in the small town that only George knew about. The spot was about a mile walk from Clay's house, and it was nearly impossible to find. Off of the main road, there was a small dirt path that lead into their town's park, and running along the path were these lush bushes that acted as fences. When Clay was in middle school, he somehow found a spot in the bushes where they weren't as dense, and behind the bushes was an area overrun with greenery that expanded beyond. It must have been the part of the park that the developers just couldn't be bothered to clear out due to the surface area, so they just decided to fence it off. Chances were, if Clay was ever missing, you could find him in that spot. After George would finish school, the fifteen year old would always ask him to come to the spot with him. There, they'd just talk about their day, catch up on shows, and Clay would play to him some of the songs he was writing.

Clay's parents kept yelling at him to go to school, and one day, they got in a big enough fight that his parents just kicked him out. Based on Clay's account, they had enough of Clay's defiance and told him that they never wanted to see again until he stopped focusing on "dumb music shit that will get you nowhere," and instead focus on school.