Crown of Iron (Book 1 of the Crown Trilogy)

Forty-Four

Micah sets a stack of financial reports down on his desk, moving on to the news of neighboring kingdom before reviewing yesterday's Stigian sightings. It has been the same routine for six weeks—me sitting across from him while he explains the purpose of everything he does.

Since the end of the Generals Summit, life in the palace has returned to normal. There are no more secret late-night meetings, sneaking into offices, or forbidden rendezvous with one very attractive general. The lack of activities leaves me free to contemplate everything I learned. Every day, my list of unanswered questions grows longer, building up inside of me to the point of combustion.

I shift in my seat, gnawing on my thumbnail.

"Are you all right?" Micah asks, sparing me a glance.

"I—nevermind."

He sits back in his chair and steeples his fingers over his lips. "You have been distracted for days; it is not like you to hold back what you are thinking."

The reason I held nothing back is that my knowledge of the five kingdoms beyond the capital was trivial. All the things I knew, Borin carefully selected to keep my focus here instead of the war raging on around us. I'm wiser now, and my concerns reach well beyond Lucent.

Wanting to curb my curiosity, I choose a simple topic. "Do you really believe every Cyffred in Stigian chooses to be there?"

Micah tilts his head to the side and stares at me before saying, "I think most of them decided to be there. Those who were initially split between my sister and me have died or were smuggled out."

"That's not what I asked. Do you think they still choose to be there?"

"No, I don't."

I'm taken aback by his confession. Believing every citizen of Stigian wants to be there has to make it easier to cope with abandoning them. How can he sit idly by if he knows an abused people are crying out for liberation? I can't think of a greater abuse of power.

"Then why did you stop smuggling Cyffreds out of Stigian?" I ask.

"It became too much of a risk. I could not do it on my own, and those who helped me were putting their lives in danger."

"But wasn't that their decision to make?"

"It was until Esmeray took her punishments too far. She enjoys pitting family members against each other. The harm she caused is..." He closes his eyes and takes steady breaths. "What she does is disgusting, and in the end, I felt those in Stigian were safer in a situation I was not aggravating."

I try to imagine what could be crueler than rotting away in a cell or separated families. What is worse than having the life-force drained from one's body until they die? It's damn near impossible to comprehend.

I store the mind-wracking thought away for another time, and ask, "If you could save just one more Cyffred without subjecting someone to her wrath, would you?"

"There are always consequences, even when we believe we are doing the right thing. Your job as queen will be to weigh the effect of your decisions and choose the one which causes the least amount of harm. So no, I would not save one more Cyffred because I know the cost to others is devastating." He reaches across the desk and places his hand over mine. "I wish I could tell you that leading is black and white, but you will wade through various hues of gray, Raelle. And I believe you will do it with a strength I have never possessed."

A pain like an arrow piercing my chest expands through my body, and my voice catches as I ask, "How can you have so much faith in me?"

Micah stands, walks around his desk, and takes a knee before me. His head remains down for a moment, and when he lifts it, his green eyes emitting pure reverence. "I knew you would be the one to set things right the moment I laid eyes on you."