One Bite

Chapter 3-10

Her words settled inside me and I heaved another sigh. "After this week, I don't know what to believe any more. I'm hoping that you've been lied to the whole time too, but it's hard for me to accept that because you and Luna Rashida seem to know everything."

I didn't mean the last words to come out as bitter as they sounded. Once they hung in the air, she flinched.

"Zara..." she whispered. "We aren't trying to make you feel ignorant. We're trying to help you overcome that, actually."

"At the risk of being too sensitive." I looked down at my hands as heat rose in my cheeks. "You don't have to talk to me like I'm an idiot. I know I don't know as much about this world, this uhh, lifestyle, as I should and I'm not book-smart like you but... I'm trying."

"It's not about that." I dragged my eyes to hers at the insistence in her voice. Surprise flashed across her face, as if this was new information. "And again, not our intention, I'm sorry."

"Then what is your intention?" My bitterness slipped out again as I emphasized the last word.

Elena's voice wavered and tears glistened her eyes. "You don't understand."

"Then help me understand," I pleaded, struggling to keep down the irritation that bubbled up inside me from spilling over and saying something that I would regret.

"I can't... do much," she confessed and dipped her head. "I'm not strong. I can't fight like Cole or Raina, I can't protect you, I'm only useful -"

"Elena." My eyes softened at the emotion that seeped into her voice, but she continued.

"My strengths are researching information," she replied. "So that you can know the truth. I'm sorry, it must feel like an emotional avalanche but we don't have time to go slow. That's not your fault but is the reality we're dealing with here."

"You're right, it's not my fault." I looked in her glossy eyes, seeing my faint reflection in her glasses. "But how can I know that you're not going to keep things from me in the future?"

'How can I trust you?' was the real question.

"I hope you can trust me," she whispered and closed her eyes. "But I understand if you don't."

Oh, shit. I mindlinked that.

A low groan vibrated my throat and I took her hand. "Elena, I'm trying, it's... hard to find out everything in my life, me, and my wolf have been a lie."

"Not everything." She sandwiched her hands around mine and squeezed from both sides. "I'm your friend and I care about you."

"Thanks." I dropped her hands and wrapped my arms around her.

She returned the hug and rubbed her hands on my back. My mouth pressed as her fingers passed over my scars, even with the barrier of my shirt.

"A lot of us here care," she whispered and squeezed my shoulders. "You have more friends than you know. After what your father did, he's made a lot of people angry. But you can't stay on the outside and hide forever, Zara. You have to use that information and start to make the hard choices."

"I know." I sighed and released her. "My brain is still trying to process this. I appreciate the answers but some questions only have more questions."

The words stung as I admitted them. No one liked admitting their ignorance but Lumi was my main concern. And the more I thought about what I didn't know about me or my past, she was my sole concern. Once I buried my bruised ego feelings about not being a special snowflake, I resigned to unpack them later.