XYXX (Camren)

Chapter 11

Ariana was tense when Lauren grabbed her shoulders and leaned forward, but she melted into his touch and returned his kiss with fervor, eyes shutting and a few tears trailing down her cheek. She grabbed the collar of his shirt and walked backwards into the house, the front door closing behind him.

“Wait.” She whispered, her lips leaving his as they fell against the living room couch. “What does this – what does this mean?”

He didn’t answer, attempting to kiss her again but she moved her face out of his way.

“Please, Laurence, I can’t do this if I don’t know what it is."

“I’m sorry.” He grunted with his eyes on everything but her. “I… I’m drunk and I don’t know what I’m thinking or doing but I – you said some things that felt really familiar and I – I want that. I really do. I think. I do like you. But I can barely read myself and I don’t know if it’s – if it’s the kind you’re looking for, but – It’d be a shame if I didn’t try, right?”

A few more tears escaped Ariana’s eyes, and she exhaled a breath of relief before gently cupping his face.

“That’s all I’m asking for.” She said, her voice soft and sweet.

She leaned forward and kissed him so slowly and passionately that it drove a stake of guilt clear through his heart, and before she could lean in again, he pushed back.

“Wait, there are things about me you don’t know, that you can’t know –“

“If that’s what’s been holding you back, I don’t care.” She said, trailing her fingers down his back. “Please, just kiss me.”

He wasn’t lying when he said the words she said to him with quivering lips and nervous eyes were familiar. In some elusive part of him that he couldn’t quite grasp or begin to try and understand, he felt those same exact words buried inside of him, towards a girl he didn’t want to even think the name of. He wasn’t sure if those thoughts and feelings were recent or if they were there for a long time, but he felt stricken to even try and uncover them. He felt scared to even approach them. 

So with a shake of the head and a calming breath, he leaned forward and captured Ariana’s lips with his, blocking out the noise in his head with the sounds of Ariana’s desperate gasps. He picked her up and sat her against the back of the couch as she wrapped her arms around him and trailed kisses down his neck. All thoughts were dashed as Ariana’s tongue found its way to a sensitive spot beneath his ear, and with a groan, he pulled her closer to himself.

She moaned as his erection pressed against her thigh and his hands fumbled to unclasp his jeans. The relief he felt when the pressure from the denim subsided was short lived when Ariana pushed him away. With a confused frown, he stared at the girl. Standing straight was hard when the alcohol was still making his vision swim.

“Trust me, Laurence, I want you so bad but –“ She bit her lip and ran a hand down his stomach to the top of his briefs. “But I meant every word I said and you’re drunk and it’s my turn not to let you do something you might…”

She moved her hand from him and crossed her arms.

“ – regret in the morning. I’ve been burned too much…” She said.

They stood in the silence of the tension for a few minutes before he straightened out his clothes and headed for the door, cab already called and head still spinning. He had one foot out the door when a shy hand shot out and held him by the shoulder.

“Call me in the morning?” Ariana asked, looking a bit out of place in her own doorway.

He nodded, taking in her hopeful smile, before stepping down the stairs and into the awaiting cab.