1- FS Barren Trees

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     A chilly January wind whipped through the barren trees of the cemetery as Brooke stared, through tear filled eyes, at her mother's casket. It all seemed like a nightmare. Four days earlier she received a call, just after 6 in the morning, and found out her mom's car had slipped on the ice while she was driving home after her 12 hour nursing shift. Her mom was fighting for her life in the very same emergency room she had just left. By the time Brooke arrived, it was too late.

     Blinking back tears and trying to focus on what the pastor was saying, Brooke squeezed her 16 month old son tighter in her arms, and the tears pushed forward uncontrollably. She was a 22 year old single mom, and her lifeline had just died. She wanted to be strong for her son; he needed her. But this, surviving after her mother's death, seemed like an impossible task.

     "Kendra Donahue Ferguson is not suffering, but is rejoicing before the Lord because of her decision to accept Him as Lord and savior," the pastor said.

     "Yeah, right," Brooke thought. She knew her mom had turned away from God soon after she gave birth to her; she'd always taught Brooke not to be sucked in by those folk tales.

     Her mom had been the one to pull her through, and support her every step of the way during her pregnancy, and after Noah's birth, while Brooke was trying to finish college. Just like she had been her mom's support years ago when her dad admitted to having an affair and a baby on the way, then asked for a divorce.

     Glancing around afterwards, Brooke noticed there was still a large crowd that had moved from the indoor funeral to the graveside service. Family and friends offered their condolences, and she responded, but felt like she was in a dreamworld waiting to wake up. Feeling dizzy she stepped back from the coffin to sit.

     "Dear, you don't look well. Let me take Noah."

     Brooke blinked and looked down to see that Noah had squirmed out of her arm and into the seat next to her. "Oh," her eyes widened when she realized she had been oblivious to his movements. "Thank you Grams." She leaned down and pecked him on the forehead. "I'm so sorry sweetie. I love you." She hoped her mood and distraction didn't worry Noah, but he smiled and placed chubby little hands on her cheeks.

     "Momma," the toddler cooed.

     "Come to Grams, Noah," Grams called to the brown haired boy while holding out her hands. Once she had him in her arms, she looked back at Brooke. "We'll leave soon and get you home to rest. You know the house will be filled with family for a few hours, but you and Noah can slip off and get some rest. You haven't been sleeping and are worn out."

~~~

     "I've just laid Noah down for his nap," Grams said as she joined Brooke on the sofa.

     "Thanks." Brooke's sad smile and empty eyes looked back at her grandmother.

     Gram's forehead creased and she placed a hand on her granddaughter's knee. "Have you decided what you want to do?" When Brooke looked at her blankly, she continued. "Whether you want to stay here and live with your father and stepmom, or move to Florida with me?"

     Brooke clenched her eyes closed, and when she opened them, there was anger. "You know I'm not going to live with my dad and his new family," she snapped. It's all dad's fault mom's dead! If he had never cheated and left her, she wouldn't have gotten that stupid job! She wouldn't have had that wreck!" Her body was shaking as she held back her tears.

     "I know this hurts, and what your father did was not right, but you can't blame him for your mom's death. And he does love you." Grams pulled Brooke into a hug, while her body shook with emotion. When Brooke calmed, Grams leaned back and looked her in the eyes speaking calmly. "It's been over a week since Kendra died, and you've not gone to work. It's fine, but you are going to have to decide what you want, or your dad's office will have to look for a replacement paralegal for you."

     Brooke fisted her hands tightly until her knuckles were white, then let go and began weeping. "I can't do this without mom," she sobbed out as the dam finally broke. "I don't want to do this without her. How can I?"

     Grams paused to think through her words, then urged, "I think you should come with me to Florida. You can take as much time as you need off, and when you're ready, your dad can use his connections to help you find a job at a law firm in Orlando. Remember, he said one of his good friends from law school has a firm there." As she watched Brooke calm, she added, "In the meantime we'll get passes to Disney, and we can introduce Noah to our favorite place. I think some Florida sun will be good for both of you."

     Brooke sniffed and wiped her tears, then glanced down and pulled at the hem of her shirt. She finally looked up as her eyes surveyed the living room of the home she'd shared with her mom. She winced at the thought of leaving their home, but knew that she needed a fresh start. "Okay, I'll do it." Then grabbing her Grandmother's hand she whispered, "I'm sorry for yelling at you. It's all just so overwhelming. Thanks for being here for me. It means more than you know."

     "I understand, dear. I'm hurting too. We'll help each other get through this, then come out stronger in the end. I'm no stranger to loss, and we will get through this. You have such a great future ahead, and a precious son to share it with."

     "I love you Grams." Brooke wrapped her arms around her grandmother, as tears streamed down her cheeks.

     "I love you too, precious one."

~~~

Author's Note (A/N): Thanks for checking out my book!  I'm excited about Brooke's story, especially since most of it takes place in Kissimmee, Florida, where my husband and I lived when our two oldest children were little.  I absolutely loved having my littles while living in central Florida!  So much to do.  But alas, my husband was anxious to move back to Tennessee. 

This first Chapter starts with Brooke losing her mom, and less than two weeks ago was the 1 year anniversary of my mom's death.  She and I were close and I miss her terribly still, although with her Alzheimer's it was a gradual loss over 14 years.  The sadness when I think of all the things she missed out on is still raw, but I have confidence I will see her again.  She is with Jesus!  The picture is actually my mom's casket at her funeral.

My desire is that this story will help you see that no matter how dark things in life seem, there is hope!

10/30/20: The book is finished, and I'm excited to finally be posting the final chapters over the few weeks as I edit them!  

If you enjoyed the first chapter, please be sure to click the star at the top or bottom of the page, and feel free to comment!

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