I wasn't so drunk that I didn't know what was going on. I knew I was lying on a weird-looking chair with my legs open in a room that looked clean but with wall decors that were not suited to my taste; I knew that Brennon was about to put his bare hands on me.
But I was drunk enough to look forward to how his skin would feel like against mine.
"You probably shouldn't do that..." I heard myself say and his movement stilled.
"You don't want me to?" he asked.
"It...seems wrong..." I replied. "I mean...fuck it, I've turned into a slut."
"No you are not a slut. Women wanting pleasure are not sluts. Whoever gave you that idea is a prick. But men forcing women regardless if the intent is to give them pleasure are called rapists and I don't want to be called one so kung ayaw mo, just say so, I'll respect it."
There's a guy like this and I had to endure two years with my ex? I thought to myself.
"Ayaw mo ba, Eira?" he repeated.
"Hindi naman...sa ayaw..." I started fiddling with the knot that was holding my robe together. "Parang...parang...nakakahiya lang..."
"I'll help you reach your peak without penetration," he offered.
How? I wanted to ask. Ang naging dating sa akin, parang manunuod kami ng sine 'tapos hindi ako magbabayad pero hindi ko rin alam kung anong title ng papanuorin.
"Um...ano pang...kasama sa package...?" I added because my drunken mind thought that if I was going to pay for a lesson, I would rather get all the perks.
He laughed; the sound deep and warm that I couldn't help but smile up at him.
"Testing muna...then you decide if you want more..." he said.
"Okay..."
Oo nga naman, bakit naman ako magbabayad 'tapos hindi ko naman pala magugustuhan dapat sample muna. Free taste kumbaga.
He moved to sit beside me and I scooted to the left to give him space.
"I'm going to start touching you now..." he told me.
I couldn't remember if I nodded or if I gave him a thumb up sign but I somehow agreed.
His hand was cold and I shuddered then gasped out loud when I felt his feathery touch on my womanhood. I was starting to get nervous and I started jiggling my right foot.
He put his other hand on my right knee. "Relax, Eira. You are not going to enjoy it if you're tensed."
I swallowed hard curling my toes as I felt his fingers tenderly groped their way around the crevices of my sex.
"Relax..." he repeated.
I nodded mutely.
He leaned forward as if to peer into my face and I nearly pushed him away. "Am I too close that you're getting uncomfortable?" he queried leaning back.
I pulled him towards me, my curiosity piqued. "What color are your eyes?"
"Blue grey..."
"Wow...I am being fondled by a man with blue grey eyes on my birthday. That's something that I can tell my grandchildren about."
He chuckled.
I felt his finger skimmed over my vaginal opening and my eyes widened.
"Instinctual talaga sa babae ito, ano? When something gets close to this part you tense up."
