Aftermath

Mind games

After Phil died, Kay felt herself weird. It didn't break her, unfortunately, his death made her stronger. She quickly recovered from it and took her company in her own hands. But Ben...his tragic end made her a lot weaker. She felt herself terrible. And people, who were asking her how is she doing annoyed her.

-How am I doing? I'm sad, broken, angry, scared, in pain, in agony, heartbroken. How can I put it into one word? - was always her thought at this moment.

After meeting Anthony, she felt herself even more worse. He told her, how Ben was talking to him on the phone once a week and that he was telling him everything that happened. When he was coming home, all his free days he spent with his father. Once,  Anthony said to Ben, that he met a girl. Ben told him to be careful in his choice. And then, they imagined how Ben will be babysitting his grandchildren.

-Hell no! I'm not retiring until my last breath, you hear me? - Ben replied to him with a smile on his face. - You can bring them to my work.

When Tony told that story to Kay, she felt herself disgusting. He wanted to live such a long and happy life. To see his kids graduate, get married and have grandchildren. Now, he won't be here when all of it will happen. He didn't even get to say goodbye to his kids. He just...died...

Kay couldn't tell him the story about the court. Anthony will hate her after that, if not worse. She killed his father, who wanted to live a lot longer life. After the talk, Kay went home. A weather was changing. It was about to rain. She walked up to the window and looked at the sky. Dark grey clouds covered it. But rain didn't scare Kay. Actually, she liked it. During the rain, no one is walking on the streets. So, she can be there alone.

When she left her house, the rain began. As she thought, there was no one on the streets. Kay, as always, walked in the park and sat on her favourite bench. The rain was getting stronger. She leaned on the back of the bench and closed her eyes.

-You shouldn't be sitting under the rain, darling. - a smooth voice made her smile. - you can catch a cold, you know.

Kay opened her eyes and turned her head. Ben was sitting next to her with his hands in his pocket.

-And what about you? - Kay asked.

Ben turned his head to Kay and smiled. She looked at her clothes. It was all wet. Her hair also. And Ben was dry, as if he was under an umbrella. But he didn't have one.

-I don't have to worry about it, Kay. - he said. They sat in silence for a few seconds just looking at each other. - Why don't you talk to your kids?

Kay made deep breath and turned away from Ben.

-I can't. They will say that you're dead. - Kay said trying to hide her tears.

-Kay...I am dead. You know that. I'm not here, I'm in your mind.

A tear rolled down her face. Even through the rain, Ben saw that it was a tear. He looked down and sat closer to Kay. She turned her head to him. Ben looked right in her eyes.

-I wish I could remove this tear. - he said.

Kay looked down on the bench. She tried to touch Ben's hand, that was on the bench but the only thing she felt was a cold, wet wood. Her hand went through his. Ben looked at it and smiled sadly. Kay was just looking at her hand that was literally into Ben's. He finally moved it and turned around.

-So. How is my boy? - Ben suddenly asked.

Kay looked at him with a surprise.

-He is a fine man. You did a good job raising him....He misses you...as much as I do.

-I know.

-Are you coming to him as well? - Kay asked.

-No. I just know that. Did you tell him the story?

Kay looked down and started to shake a little because of the cold.

-No...I can't.

-Mom? - a sudden voice made Kay jump a little bit. It was her daughter. - Mom, what are you doing here?! You gonna catch a cold! Let's go home!

Kay turned her head to Ben. He smiled and nodded.

-Mom? What are you looking at? - her daughter asked.

-Nothing, dear. Nothing...

Kay slowly got up and walked to her daughter.

-Oh my God! You're so wet! We should go home fast.

She started walking away and Kay was standing still for a few seconds. She looked up. The rain wasn't going to stop. Kay turned around. The bench was empty. The side, that she was sitting at was a little dry and Ben's was all wet...Because he is not here...And he never will be...

-Mom! Come on!

-Yes...coming...