Rental Boyfriend [NAMJIN]

Chapter 4: I'm sure he misses you too

Seokjin walked through the large doors of Family Love Corp that same day, a distant but dream-like smile formed on his lips. Even though Namjoon might've left with Jimin long ago, he still felt the warmth of Namjoon's hand on his. He still saw the victorious smile on Namjoon's face in his mind. Seokjin found himself wishing Namjoon was beside him as he waited in the elevator, he wished that the two of them would battle to see who could click the most buttons out of mere good fun.

"Seokjin-san! Come sit with us!" He barely registered her voice before sitting down at the circular table, being the last of five to join.

"Why do you look so happy Seokjin-san?" Seokjin turned to his co-worker's voice and merely smiled brighter.

"I'm just happy is all, today's a beautiful day, don't you think?" Another co-worker merely shook her head.

"We all know it's for a different reason Seokjin-san. You were just with a client; you never look that happy after being with a client. Why is that?" Seokjin paled at that comment, the dream-like smile from before had dispersed and had been replaced with a worried expression. 'They can't know anything, they may tell my boss, and then I might be fired. My feelings for Namjoon-san are a bit torn, I can't recognise them, but I sure as hell can say that they need to be concealed. Can I trust them?'

"Seokjin-san? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." He smiled weakly and faintly looked out the window, pressing his hand against the warm glass.

"I wish that could be us." Seokjin whispered, near silent. In his viewpoint there was a couple, 2 teenage girls, they were holding hands and laughing, eating ice cream just as him and Namjoon had done so. The parallels between the two were so horrifying, that he had to look away. To focus on anything other than the girls outside his window. 'How do they get to be happy with each other, and I don't get to be happy with him? Wait, no, I shouldn't think about such things. I'm not supposed to be emotional when working with clients. But he's not a client, he's something else entirely...'

"Why can't that be us?" Seokjin whispered once more, louder this time.

"Seokjin-san!" The person next to him called. Seokjin turned his head as if someone had slapped him in the face and executed a perfect fake smile, which no one believed at that point of time.

"Yes?"

"Do you have feelings for someone?" Seokjin's eyes widened and he shook his head madly. 'Deflect, deflect, deflect.'

"What? No!"

'Yes!'

"Are you sure about that Seokjin-san?"

"Absolutely!"

'NO!'

"So, you don't have feelings for a client? No feelings at all?"

"That's against the rules!"

'But I'll break the rules if it means you'll love me back. Anything for you.'

"So? Love is love, the company can't judge that, that's ridiculous."

'Anyone can judge, and they will judge. They'll use it against you in so many bloody ways it's not funny.'

Seokjin snatched a piece of paper from a pile nearby and crumpled it into a ball, throwing it to the other side of the room in pure frustration. He snarled, the dark thoughts destroying his mind brutally.

"Why is this so difficult?" His breathing was shaky, and his hands were bound to his thighs. 'Why does it have to be this way? Why must I lust after him, our limit is hand holding, that's not enough for a relationship to sustain itself.'

"Seokjin-san? Are you alright? Talk to us." The calming voice of his co-worker brought him back to reality. Seokjin could read the sincerity in her eyes, he could see it in her hands, in her eyes, in the way she spoke and in her body language.

"Love is hard." She smiled sadly. The others had already left to do their own thing.

"It is, isn't it? Who's on your mind, Seokjin-san?" Seokjin placed his hands in his lap and fidgeted with them anxiously.

"Just a client of mine."

"Tell me about this client that's on your mind." Seokjin smiled blindingly as he was reminded of Namjoon.

"His eyes are warm and inviting, always ready to let me in. His shyness reminds me of the people back in my hometown, he gets flustered easily and it's adorable. I prefer him in his natural self, he's a lot like a koala, the Australian animal? He's like cotton candy, he's so delicate and soft yet so, so, tempting. I really want to get to know him more and I really want to see where this goes. He's just beautiful and adoring, you know?" His co-worker smiled softly and put her hand over Seokjin's.

"I think you have feelings for him Seokjin-san, let your heart lead when it comes to love, in this case, your head is irrational." Seokjin smiled softly and nodded, taking his hand from hers and instead using it to express his feelings dramatically.

"I really miss him, Jimin, him and I were going out for ice cream and I held their hands to get them out of there, Jimin let go, but Namjoon (the client) didn't. Namjoon is the client by the way, we were holding hands the whole way, he's so cute when he eats ice cream. He dropped me off here when we were walking and he and Jimin waved in the cutest way! God, Namjoon-san and Jimin-san are truly like father like son. Have I told you about Jimin-san? He's one of the sweetest hardworking kids around, he's such a good kid and Namjoon-san is such a good dad." His co-worker smiled fondly and flicked her hair from her shoulder to her back.

"I'm sure he misses you too, Seokjin-san."

"It felt like family, it felt real, you know?" She frowned.

"Seokjin-san, just because you have to follow your heart doesn't mean you can delude yourself into thinking a rental fantasy is real. I know you like him, and Jimin-san is a great kid, but you can't think like that. Be realistic." Seokjin nodded stiffly.

"I know Ayaka-san, I have to stay real." She nodded, smiling sadly.

"I'm sorry Seokjin-san."

"It's not your fault."

'I'm the one who has feelings for someone who's renting me to date them, not you. Don't get involved.'

Author's Note: Deja Vu is so good, oh my god! Dreamcatcher, I'm becoming an InSomnia as soon as I have bloody time! (I have a surprise for y'all!)

:)