The Cray Cray One Shots! (One Direction One Shots)

The Cray Cray Creeper

The Joyful times:

Yesterday, we spotted the beautiful, lush, sexy Niall Horan exiting Nando's with a paper bag of food. He was causally skipping down the sidewalk when he spotted Justin Bieber, his arch enemy. Niall joyfully said hello but then it seemed like Justin was on drugs because he tried to grab Niall Horan's food. Now Ladies and Gentlemen, you should all know what happened to the squirrel who tried to grab Niall's food. Niall had picked it up by its tail and left it in a trash can to rot there....FOREVER. So you could only imagine what happened to Justin. Niall had immediatey grabbed a nearby exotic antelope and stabbed that little cunt. He stabbed him real good, then he picked up his body, and threw it into a nearby propane tank. and THAT my friends, is why you never EVER, mess with Nialler's food. He will track you down, and kill you in horrendous and gruesome ways. AND THAT IS OUR JOYFUL NEWS OF THE DAY :D HAVE A NICE LIFE!!!!! <3

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Niall's P.O.V

I exited nandos with a paper bag of chicken and fries, perfectly content with the world. Suddenly I spotted my idol Justin Bieber walkin down the street. "Hey Man!" I call to him. His eyes are bloodshot, and he has a paper sack labeled 'marijuana' in his hand. hmm i wonder what could have been in the sack? maybe nandos? I hope so! then we could have a nandos party together! Im just about to go up to him and suggest the idea of a nandos party, when he goes all Cray Cray and says,

"HEY I WANT SOME NANDO'S!!!" Like seriously what the fuck? He has his own freaking Nando's paper bag with Marijuana Chicken, which reminds me I have to try that chicken soon, I haven't tasted it yet! So anyways, he tries to grab my Nando's and I scream,

"AHHH!! GET AWAY FROM ME YOU CRAZY CUNT!!", And grab a nearby exotic antelope that was crossing the street and stabbed him in the stomach.

"Ouch." Justin says, dropping on his stomach and I stab him again to make sure he won't take my chicken. My chicken is important and oh em gee the fries are like so juicy and crispy and-

Justin snaps me out of my daydream and tries to grab my chicken again. I scream like a girl and pick him up and threw him on a propane tank. Justin fainted there and I took his his Marijuana Chicken, taking a bite and nodding approvingly. I should so order this chicken next time. So I get in my UFO and travel the rest of the way home, chewing on the Marijuana Chicken.

THE NEXT DAY....

I get up from bed really excited. Today I get to go to my Nando's party I planned with my best friends! So I hurry up and take a shower putting on my swag pink fluffy tutu with rainbow stockings and a cute pink shirt that says "I love my Mommy." I look at myself approvingly in the mirror and then realise what I'm missing! I grab my neon green Victoria Secret bra and put it on over my shirt adding a nice touch to the combination.

"Perfect!" I say, grabbing my keys for my UFO and going to the kitchen. I grab my leftover Marijuana chicken and semi-fried chicken and fries from yesterday and go outside. Right as I close the door I hear a voice say,

"Niiiiaalllll, Niiiiaaaaalllll" It sounds like a ghostish voice kind of like a very deep voice moan. I turn around looking for who said it and when I see nobody I shrug and start walking towards my UFO when I hear the voice again.

"Niiiaalll Hooorraaannnn..." I whip around ninja-style and have my hands out infront of me ready to beat up any random hoe that decides to steal my 600 dollar tutu. "Niaallll..." this time I hear the voice come excatly from my right and I turn around and scream at the terrifying sight. Standing in front of me is Justin, but he looks different. This Justin has a beared, like a really long beared that reaches his over-grown toes. He has very judging eyes and theres wrinkles everywhere on his face. Justin is also wearing a tutu and a pillowcase as a shirt...I have to admit the pillow case is such a good idea.