And They Were Roommates (A Sakusa Story)

11. Distance (ft. Sakusa and crackhead Komori)

"You're just quieter today, that's all." I mumble, taken aback by Sakusa's unbothered response. "Is it... because of qualifiers?" Sakusa glances down at me, his medical  mask hiding half of his face. Are his lips pursed, fighting to keep a secret? Or are they relaxed, with nothing to hide?

"I'm sorry." He says, his voice barely above a whisper. Although his words are terse, there's an unmistakable weight behind them. It's like he's apologizing for something greater than being unresponsive, and relief washes over me as I'm finally able to decipher his mood swings. He must be apologizing for his breakdown yesterday; that must be it. I know how much he hates acknowledging his weaknesses.

"Hey, it's okay. I know you're under a lot of stress right now." The issue of qualifiers must be weighing on his mind after our talk last night. "I'm here for you if you need anything."

"Thanks." Sakusa mumbles, the bags beneath his eyes suddenly more prominent. Neither of us speak as we approach the dining hall, and as we walk I realize that the distance between us has grown.

_________

Breakfast isn't much better. By some miracle Komori manages to join us at our regular table only five minutes after we arrive, but he clearly has no idea how to handle 'tired Sakusa'. Only a minute or two after he sits down, Komori bolts up from his seat and clears his throat.

"I am going to go get some coffee. I hear they've refilled the HAZELNUT PACKETS. Y'know, the ones (l/n) LOVES and will do anything to acquire." I silently pray that he doesn't send me an aggressive wink... but he sends me multiple aggressive winks. Oh goodness, lord have mercy.

"I'll go with you." I offer before he can give me an indirect seizure. Together, Komori and I make our way over to the coffee station.

I almost cry when I see that the hazelnut flavoring is out of stock. "We're too late!" I wail, sinking to my knees. "When the world needed him most..."

"...he vanished." Komori finishes, patting my shoulder sympathetically.

"Oh, you watch Avatar too?"

"Oh my god YES. Adopting Avatar the Last Airbender is the best thing Netflix has ever done!" Komori shouts excitedly, eyes practically sparkling as he bounces in place like an infant girl. "I just finished Tales of Ba Sing Se yesterday." He sheds a single tear. "Leaves on the vine... falling so slow...."

"Like fragile tiny shells... drifting in the foam..." I add, using my best Uncle Iroh voice.

"Little soldier boy... come marching home- WAIT A MINUTE! This isn't why we're here." Without missing a beat Komori peeks over the coffee makers, as if to see if Sakusa's still a safe distance away. It looks like the coast is clear because he nods in approval before crouching down beside me.

"Okay, I totally lied about the hazelnut being restocked- sorry- but what the hell happened to Windex Wanda?" Komori hisses. "He's acting like Bath and Bodyworks went out of business, or discontinued their eucalyptus scent, or both."

"I dunno, he's been like this since I woke up! I'm pretty sure it's cause of qualifiers and the virus, so I'm trying to give him space."

Komori sighs. "Yeah, that's what I assumed. But... wow, he's acting super weird! I'd like to think I know Sakusa pretty well, being his cousin and all-"

My jaw drops. "Wait, what?"

"- but I've never seen him like this, not even during nationals last year. Sakusa's always been an introvert, but it's like the very essence that makes him Sakusa has been diluted! Where's the flavor?" Komori demands, snapping his fingers as if to prove his point. "He hasn't commented on my poor breakfast choices, glared at the girls ogling him from the other side of the room, and his eyes aren't sharp and bitchy like they usually are... I don't like it."