Bella and Edward One-shots

4. New Moon Christmas

I turned over onto my other side. I pulled my large comforter closer against my body and rubbed the sleep from my eyes. No nightmares last night.

I was both relieved and saddened to not have a nightmare. Since he left me alone in the forest, abandoned me and left me feeling hopeless, he had haunted my dreams. I would often wake up screaming and sweating from a horrible dream, and Charlie would rush in to comfort me. Though now Charlie has gotten accustomed to my yelps and tunes me out. I don't blame him.

I tried to forget about him. He wasn't coming back. He told me he didn't love me, and that I should move on. I promised him I would try my best to do good for myself.

I pushed myself out of bed and wandered into the bathroom in the hallway. Out of the window I could see light snowflakes falling from the gray morning sky. I grimaced. Gross.

Wandering downstairs and thinking about how I would waste my day today, the glittering Christmas tree Charlie had dragged in surprised me. I racked my head for the date, and it was tough. The minutes, hours, weeks, months had all passed in one slow lull, blurring together uncannily. Was today Christmas?

It would make sense. I sighed and quietly walked into the living room. Charlie sat in his recliner, a mug of coffee in his hands, his pajamas still on. I couldn't bring myself to look at his face. The last time I did that the pain I saw there nearly broke me again.

"Merry Christmas, Bells. You should call your mom." He said as I sat across from him on the sofa.

I managed a very minuscule smile. "Merry Christmas." My voice sounded unrecognizable. I cleared my throat.

I spent the morning with Charlie. He watched some holiday movie on the t.v. while I sat there. I couldn't focus on the storyline, but I heard their voices every now and then, along with someone crying and cheerful music.

Finally, around dinnertime, Charlie said he was going to visit Billy Black. I nodded to his words. I was a little glad he was leaving. He would be with someone more in the holiday mood, and get to celebrate happily. I could tell he was worried about me, and I wished he wasn't.

I slumped back up to my room and sat staring outside the window. The snow was still falling gradually. I wrapped my arms around my middle and held myself. Sometimes I felt like I might shatter at any random moment.

I sat for hours most likely. I couldn't find the energy to move myself. The sun set, leaving me staring out at a pitch black abyss. It might've seemed unappealing to me just months ago, but somehow I found that darkness comforting. It felt as if it was the same as me. It knew my pain better than I.

My body stirred awake. Arms were underneath me, and suddenly the arms were gone and I was in a bed that felt like my own. I curled into myself. The covers pulled over me, giving me instant warmth.

"Merry Christmas, Bella," Charlie whispered, his voice sad, and I drifted back off to sleep.