Because I Love You (SasuNaru AU) ✔

Chapter 15: Reasons To Let Go

I woke up the morning with instant regret. I slapped my face as my long blonde hair draped down my back.

What was I thinking when I kissed him?! Ahhh I'm such an idiot!

Last night I had kissed Sasuke. In the heat of the moment, it felt like the right thing to do until he pushed me away in fear.

Ugh, I'm so freaking stupid! Stupid Naruko, why did you do that?! And on top of that, you have a boyfriend! Uahjqkaka!

I slapped my face one last time in disappointment before standing up to change into my uniform. I looked at myself in the mirror as I tied my hair. Okay...I need to act normal...I'm just eating breakfast then getting the hell out of my apartment.

I smiled at myself in the mirror, practicing for my grand performance in a few minutes, but the smile soon faded. Who am I kidding? I seriously messed up...

I banged my forehead against the mirror with a sigh. "I wanna die...Why did I kiss him...?"

I groaned loudly as I pushed myself off the mirror. As I stared at my reflection, I no longer saw the happy-go-lucky girl I once was. Before meeting Sasuke I lived in the present and enjoyed every moment to its fullest. But now that I know my supposed unhappy future, I can't live the way I use to.

I'm scared of messing up. I'm scared of the possibility of having an unhappy future. I'm scared of not being able to fall in love with someone other than Sasuke. I'm even scared of walking around my own neighborhood because of the chance that I might run into this time's Sasuke. I use to be brave and reckless, but now I'm scared and prudent.

I felt a tear form in my eye, but I refused to let it fall. Crying was all I had been doing since Sasuke arrived. Maybe that's why he wanted to make sure we never met. He knows we're not good for each other so he's trying to let me go.

The thoughts in my head were intoxicating. My mood was depleting and my body began to feel heavy. I couldn't allow myself to fall into a pit of sorrow, so I shook my head madly before slapping my cheeks.

Idiot! Get it together! I gotta act normal! It's only awkward if you make it awkward so smile, damn it!

I turned to face the door. I took a deep breath and slowly made my way to it. I placed my hand on the doorknob and exhaled. Alright, Naruko...be cool. You told him it was an accident as soon as he pushed you away...but how well does that lie work on 27-year-old man?

I did one final sigh before I left my room and made my way to the table. As I approached the kitchen, I saw Sasuke still making breakfast. I slowly sat down in the chair as I eyed the table in fear. All is good. You're as cool as a cucumber. You got this.

The sound of the plates hitting the table took me by surprise. I jumped for a second before locking eyes with Sasuke. In an instant, we both averted each other's gaze as he sat down before me.

The atmosphere between us was thick and unbearable. I wanted to run out of the apartment and never come back. But instead, I picked up my egg, ham, and cheese sandwich and began to eat.

It was silent. Usually, I would start a conversation and we talk, but I had broken that routine. I ruined what we had because I was impulsive. Ah yes, breakfast with a side of awkwardness...my favorite...

I looked at my sandwich sadly before taking another bite. I wanna crawl in a whole...

"Naruko."

"Huh--uh, yes!" I glanced up at him in surprise as he called my name.

His expressions began to change, but he quickly calmed himself down before speaking again. "About...About last night...I...I know you said the kiss was an accident, but--"