Making Choices

7

She hoped Alya could forgive her for what she was about to do. But she had to, there was no other option. It was Alya or everyone she held dear, and it wasn't fair that her parents had to suffer because of Alya. Tom Dupain and Sabine Cheng were two of the kindest people she had ever met and never deserved to be in the middle of the apocalypse. "It was her."

Alya's face twisted and contorted with anger. She struggled against her captor, managing to free an arm long enough to throw an accusing finger towards Ladybug. "She's lying, I didn't steal anything!"

The leader stepped over to Alya and smashed his gun into the side of Alya's head. Her head clouded and she squinted, dazed from the blow. Ladybug and Adrien stayed silent, not wanting to incur the wrath of the leader themselves.

"You, boy, who stole from us?" Adrien looked like he was about to pass out. He was starting to shake, glancing between the gun in front of his face, Ladybug, and Alya as she slowly came back to her senses.

Adrien was thrown to the ground, sliding a few feet before coming to stop, his hands skinned. He glanced at Ladybug before raising a single hand and pointing at Alya. "It was her."

"No!" Alya let out a scream before she was dropped to the ground in front of Adrien. She tried to escape but was stopped by two bullets to the back of her head. Blood splattered onto Adrien's face and he sat bolt upright, scratching at his face to try and remove it.

Ladybug was released more gently but still stumbled on her feet. She rushed over to Adrien, grabbing his wrists and pressing them against the ground, preventing him from hurting himself more.

"You can keep the bag of rice." In seconds, the gang was gone, leaving the door off its hinges and Ladybug and Adrien kneeling on the floor in a pool of blood. Adrien was beginning to sob, his shoulder shaking and his breath rattling loudly.

He began to rock, the sobbing subsiding enough for him to begin speaking, his eyes glassy and unfocused. "It was all my fault, it was all my fault, I killed her, I killed Alya, her sisters are alone now, this is all my fault."

Underneath his skin, Adrien's pulse was rapid but weakening. His skin was starting to shine with a thick layer of sweat and was rapidly turning grey. He was going into shock. Out of nowhere, he yanked his arms from Ladybug's grip and turned to the side, retching violently. This continued for a few moments before he stopped moving.

Reaching out and placing her hand on Adrien's shoulder, Ladybug could feel his pulse beating through every inch of his body. His skin was clammy and seemed to burn her hand, but Adrien needed comfort. "None of this was your fault. This couldn't have been avoided, sometimes things just work out for the worst."

"What about her sisters?"

That was a thought that had flickered through Ladybug's head when Alya had first stolen the rice from the gang and many times after. Without Alya around to look after them, they would probably die, starving to death alone and afraid. Ladybug had no way of knowing how much food they had left or how well hidden they were, it would be near impossible to find them without that knowledge. Paris was packed with run-down apartments and rubble, creating hundreds if not thousands of perfect hiding places.

Knowing this was another empty promise, Ladybug laced her fingers through Adrien's. "When we get back to Paris, I'll look for them and help them find their sister. I promise."

Adrien was avoiding her eyes. Was he hiding something?

"We need to keep moving, the longer we stay here with the door off its hinges, the more likely we are to be found. Once you're feeling better, we can have breakfast somewhere." She didn't know how to deal with someone going into shock, it was never really something that had come up, but she could keep him talking. That might work, right? If he was distracted from what he had seen, he couldn't be affected by it. Hopefully. While she was almost completely desensitised to death, Ladybug knew Adrien wasn't and now wasn't the right time to process any amount of emotions. That could be done later. For now, survival was the only thing that mattered.

As soon as Adrien nodded in understanding, Ladybug stood up, ignoring the fact that Adrien didn't seem like himself, even though she kept telling herself that he wasn't getting worse. If only she could believe that.

"Grab the bags and wait outside, I'll deal with everything inside." Ladybug knew she had to give Alya some kind of funeral, even if it was just moving the sheet from the skeleton upstairs to cover her. Her death had been violent and revengeful, maybe giving her some privacy would alleviate the guilt she was beginning to feel.

Adrien picked the cat up, which still didn't have a name, and walked towards the bags. He picked them both up with ease, even though the kitten had perched itself on his shoulder. The bags didn't even seem to be a problem when he carried them to the door and outside. Apparently, he was much stronger than Gabriel thought he was. That was always something that shocked Ladybug; just how easily people could go from being naive and innocent into someone more like her in seconds, just because of a single situation.

It wasn't just the apocalypse that changed people. The akuma attacks that began months before school should have started, just six weeks before the apocalypse began, changed people, too. Loud noises in the streets would make people jump and look around in fear, wondering whether they should run for cover or whether it would be too late. Having an apocalypse destroy everything less than two months later was just cruel. Surviving an akuma was so much easier than living in a fallen world.

Ladybug jogged up the stairs, taking them two at a time until she reached the second floor. The sleeping bags they had used last night were still where they had been left before the gang arrived. Ladybug rolled her and Adrien's sleeping bags up before pulling Alya's back down the stairs to cover her body. Once she was finished inside, Ladybug took the rolled-up sleeping bags outside and set them in front of Adrien and their bags.

There was still one more thing she wanted to do. This was still a place where someone had lived, and where two people had died. The building deserved to have its door placed back where it belonged, even if wasn't in the exact condition it used to be in. They had to be on their way soon, if not right now, so Ladybug propped the door back up in the doorframe and returned to where Adrien was standing. "We should start moving."

They walked for nearly an hour before Ladybug finally began to feel hungry, a sensation she hadn't experienced for nearly a day. The last time she had eaten was breakfast before they left, which meant she should've been hungry long before this. It was somewhat of a blessing, though, because they had been able to get much further away from the government building than she had originally thought they would.

She hadn't checked on Adrien or Alya in that time, and neither of them had said anything, which could mean any number of things. Maybe that was part of the reason Alya had stolen the rice in the first place; she didn't think they had food.

Now that they were on the road again, Alya's death played on her mind a lot. Something in the back of her mind told her that she could have come up with a plan to save her, to save all of them, but she had opened her mouth and told the truth. A choice that had affected all of them, especially Adrien, but the only other option was to stay silent and let all of them be shot. There was no way to fight everyone else in the room, not when there were so many weapons ready to be used. Another ten, maybe twenty seconds could have been added to their lives, but in the end it ultimately would have been useless.

One life lost was better than three.

But was it only one life? Alya's sisters depended on her, and even though Ladybug had sworn to herself she would try to find them, she had no idea when she would be back in Paris. It could be weeks or even months from now, and by then it could be too late. That meant she would be responsible for another three deaths. Three too many.

"I'm hungry." It was the first thing Adrien had said since they left. Since they had strapped their beds back onto their bags and walked away from their actions, leaving behind every reminder of the consequences that had followed. Even Alya's bag had been left behind, making Ladybug feel a hint of relief that she had repacked the bags last night. This wasn't the situation she had been imagining while she did it, but it was a good choice, nonetheless. It made everything slightly easier, and they didn't have to stick around any longer this morning.

Ladybug looked around, looking for any buildings that looked like they would have roof access. One at the end of the street had a visible door on its roof, making it the perfect candidate. The door looked fairly flimsy, too, so it would be easy enough to gain access. She pointed it out to Adrien. "We can eat in there, on the roof."

Kicking the door open was easy, it was almost rotting away already. Not bothering to investigate the building, Ladybug led Adrien up the stairs, making sure she dodged any obvious holes in the stairs. Someone else had been here before them, but there were no outward signs of life when they arrived, so Ladybug decided she could take the risk. Just this once. After this, she wouldn't risks that would put Adrien's life on the line.

The roof offered a clear view of the streets in front of them, which meant they could see anyone who was approaching them.

With all the chaos that had happened in the past few hours, combined with the lack of food, Ladybug couldn't remember which bag the lighter was in. They could use the broken door to light a fire, but she would have to sort through the bags until she remembered where the lighter was.

Ladybug held her hand out, offering to take Adrien's bag. When he handed it to her, she crouched down and started to rifle through the bags, moving everything around haphazardly until her fingers brushed against what she was looking for. Bingo.

"Stay here and watch the cat, I'm going to grab some of the door so we can light a fire and cook something. I'll be back in a few minutes," Ladybug said as she dropped her bag and turned back towards the door. While she didn't exactly want to leave Adrien alone on the roof in his current state of mind, she couldn't force him to follow her around like a lost dog.

Conscious of how much time she was taking, Ladybug was back on the roof with an armful of rotting wood in a few minutes. Adrien was sitting near the bags, running his fingers over the kitten's fur. At least he was still in the same place as where Ladybug had left him. Alya's death really had knocked him around, it was obvious.

Ladybug dropped the pile of wood onto the roof and reached for the lighter, only to have the kitten race past her, startled by the noise. Without thinking, Ladybug raced after it, catching the tiny animal as it leapt towards the edge of the roof. Before she could turn around and return to the fire, something on the street below caught her eye.

Her parents were standing just outside the building, covered in blood. Ladybug gasped. How did they get here? How did they know where to find her? None of that mattered now, she had to get to them. Racing down the stairs and onto the street, Ladybug searched her surroundings frantically, scanning for any sign of her parents. There was nothing there. There wasn't even blood on the ground where they had been standing. "Maman? Papa? Where are you?"

Silence was her only reply, and even more confusion. What was going on? Was this some kind of hallucination or was this the universe's way of making her pay for all the lives she had taken. But why her parents? They didn't deserve to suffer for her actions, she was only trying to protect them.

Accepting that she wouldn't find her parents Ladybug walked back inside their building, her feet dragging slightly. When she reached the roof again, Adrien was waiting for her. "Are you okay? You just ran off with the cat. I thought something was wrong."

Ladybug was about to tell Adrien everything, until she remembered that he wasn't like her. He had grown up sheltered and had been kept hidden away for the last few months. Her stories of death and murder would only make his situation worse. But if she kept everything locked away in her mind, what would her secrets do to her?

"You can tell me anything, Ladybug."

But could she really?