The One Who Tried

My Undoing

There once was a girl. Her name was Kat. Now, Kat was a sweet girl. She was kind and caring, adorable and shy, always looking out for her friends and family, and always smiling. As Kat got older she tried to keep up with the norm. Clothes, movies, songs, bands, groups, slang, the whole thing. 

High School Musical, Jonas Brothers, Justin Bieber, it all flashed before her. Ruffles and pink and pastel and sparkles. Long hair, wavy hair, blonde hair, brown hair, braided, pleated, and everything in between. 

Finally, she gave up. She heard it was okay. It was okay to not be with the norm. People need to be individuals. They need their own style. Thus began her search for herself. Star Wars, Star Trek, basketball, games, these made her happy. They were different and they were her. 

Happy now, she got more engrossed, and people laughed. But it was okay, it was different. It was her. And she piled it on. She formed herself, made herself as she saw fit. Bands, fandoms, fanfiction, shows, you name it. Books and subjects and instruments and plans for a future. She found she liked girls, guys were too much work, but they had nice clothes. She found and formed herself, and for once, Kat was happy.

But no. Apparently, you can't be like that. If you want to be different, that's all fine and dandy, but girls should wear skirts, makeup, have long hair, and like pink. Oh, cheer leading as well. And boys should be opposite. No mixing and no matching.

So what's the point? Kat asked herself. It is encouraged to be different, but you must do so within certain parameters. The poor girl soon found everything she loved and did that made her her was torn and beaten, lashed at and ridiculed. You can like music, but not rock. You can like shows, but only romance and 'chick flicks'. Oh, and your good grades and AP classes? Nope. Too weird. And all those books? Nerd! No anime, that's just... ew. Short hair and boy clothes and you date girls? Faggot!

That was only the beginning to the poor girl's troubles. Her family hated her, society hated her, and she felt so alone. She hated herself. She wanted to cry, to scream, to run away, to just make them understand. She cut and stopped eating, threw up if she did, cried to sleep, just to make herself feel whole. Feel like no one hated her. But everyone did. Her voices did as well. She just wanted to be perfect.

Nothing's gotten better, her parents bash anything she loves every second they can get, and now I must ask: are you so cruel as to let this girl, and others like her (not just girls) to rot away and feel alone and forsaken when society said it's okay to be normal?