Why Wattpad Drives Me Crazy | ✔️

77| Types of Annoying Authors

Heyyyyy! So I've done a rant on "types of readers", so now I'm going to do one on authors.
But this time, it's the annoying kind.
Inner voice: genie_us, what is your problem? All the shit that you've just written above is pretty self-explanatory by the title, dummy.
Me: oh.
Inner voice: just rant already.
Me: LEGO!!!
Note: I may be guilty of some of these.
#HypocrisyAtItsFinest
::

1. Character Killers

You are no stranger to these authors but dammit they're still alive and kicking and I think it's time to kick them out of their darn stupidity because THE NEXT TIME SOMEONE HAS TO GO INTO A FUCKING COMA FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO REALIZE HOW MUCH THEY LURRRVV THEM I WILL FUCKING GO APE SHIT ON THE BOOK.

NO JOKE GUYS

2. Always Busy

These are the authors who are ALWAYS busy but the thing is, it's not the kind of busy where they won't be on Wattpad for a long time, no. It's the kind of busy where they will constantly tell you that they're busy, and it's annoying because this is how their book will go like:
-----
Chapter 1
*short chapter*
A/N: sorry guys for such a short chapter, I've been soooo busy.

new post: NOT AN UPDATE!

Chapter 2
*insert chapter here*
Sorry for such a long wait, I had to go to work last night...

new post: NOT AN UPDATE!

Chapter 3...

-----

And it goes on and on, like that. I have no problem with you being busy and all, but if you're always fucking expressing how busy you are, it makes me exhausted. Because I'll just get the impression that your book, and your readers, are such a burden to you.

3. Goal Setters

By the title I've given them, you think they're good, ambitious people. But I fucking hate what they do.
These are the authors who set "targets", or "goals", for their books to reach. And I'm not saying that this is such a bad thing. The time it becomes annoying and quite frankly pissing off is when they make it the readers' responsibility to get them to their targets by saying shit like:

"I'll only update the next chapter when I get 1,000 reads, 800 votes and 500 comments on this one!"
I've probably ranted about them before, but they need a double mention.

I'm not going to get all cheesy and say "authors should be writing because they love it and not because of the number of reads", but I honestly think that when a writer does that I lose my respect for them. This is because I don't understand why I should be attached to these conditions. The novel could be awfully good, and the writer will leave it on a cliffhanger (#GAAH), but I don't think they are getting reads or votes or comments the right way.

In a sense, it's a lot like modern-day colonialism. (Warning: touchy topic..) it's a minuscule version of how, when Uganda had proposed their [inhumane] homosexuality bill, USA stopped sending aid to them. I was so pissed off at that. Why should you attach conditions so that someone can do what you want them to do? The law was terrible and inhuman, I agree, yet I also did not agree with USA's action against it either. Uganda is not USA's Puppet that they just decide to cut aid to manipulate them into having the same policies as you.

(By the way, the bill did not pass, so please don't go off at Uganda guys).

Likewise, the readers are not the authors' puppets by which they should do a certain something so that the author can keep doing their job. So no, I will not vote or comment anymore because contrary to what you think, I can do very well without your book.