The Psychopath (Stand Alone #2)

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Niyaya ako ni Jieun na magswimming sa pool. At sino ako para tumanggi? Pinagsuot ko na lang sya ng cycling shorts tsaka sando since wala sya rash guard.

Cycling shorts din ang sinuot ko at nag-bra ako for my top. Nagsuot muna ako ng sando dahil ayoko namang bababa ako nang naka-bra lang.

Bumaba na kaming dalawa, at nakita ko si Blaze na nasa dining room lang at nagkakape.

He finished his coffee when he saw us.

"Daddy, we're ready!" Jieun said. He looked at Jieun.

"Okay, you can go there first. I'll just change." he said. He looked at me but it was quick and he walked upstairs. I just shrugged.

Nauna na kami sa pool, sa side part to ng house. So walang bodyguard dito kaya malaya kaming makakapagliwaliw.

Hinubad ko yung tshirt ko bago lumusong sa pool. Tumalon naman si Jieun kaya natalsikan ako sa mukha. Tumawa lang ako.

She's excited and happy.

"Daddy!" she shouted.

I looked at Blaze who is half naked now, while he's wearing a trunks. I can't help but to stare at his abs. It's like a sculpture made by sculptor. His abs are perfect and well-toned.

Why he is so sexy?

"I might melt Louise." i heard him said. Kaya napaiwas ako ng tingin. Parang gusto ko na lang magpalamon sa lupa, kainis!!

Lumusong na sya sa pool at agad na nilapitan si Jieun. Nagharutan sila ni Jieun na parang ako ay wala lang. Pinanood ko na lang sila kung paano maglaro.

Napangiti ako nang makita kung gaano kasaya si Jieun, ganon din sya pero may kulang dahil hindi buo yung saya sa mata nya.

Binuhat nya si Jieun sa balikat nya. Humawak si Jieun sa buhok nya. Naglakad si Blaze sa pool habang buhat nya sa balikat si Jieun. Tawa lang sila ng tawa hanggang napagod na sila.

"Si mommy naman, daddy!" sabi ni Jieun.

He looked at me like he's reading, umiwas lang sya ng tingin at ngumiti kay Jieun. May sinabi sya kay Jieun na hindi ko narinig pero naging malungkot si Jieun dahil sa sinabi nya.

*****

"Si mommy naman, daddy!" Jieun said.

I looked at her she's looking at us. I looked at Jieun, and smiled. "Your mommy will be angry at me if i do that to her. And you know it didn't work right?" she sighed. I know she's sad. But what can i do? It will never change anymore.

"But why it didn't work?" she asked.

I sighed. "It's because mommy don't like me, and she hates me. But i understand mommy, and i'm not angry."

"Should we still continue it?"

"But it will not work anymore so maybe we should stop."

She sighed again. "I understand daddy." i kissed her forehead.

"But atleast we tried?" i smiled at him.

She nodded. "You are sad right?" she asked.

"Of course. But it's okay. Don't tell this to mommy okay?" she nodded.

I carried her. "Let's play again." luckily, her mood changed when we started to play again.

After almost a half an hour of playing in pool, we decided to go up from the pool.

"Let's shower Jieun." i heard Louise's voice. I just sat on chair and wiped my body using the towel.

"Daddy, we'll take a shower now." she said.

I kissed her cheeks. "Okay!" she smiled and waved at me. They left here so i'm alone here now.

I'm avoiding Louise? Not that i'm avoiding her but as much as possible i don't want her skin to touch mine. Seeing her how she don't want being touched by me made my heart broke.

And i don't have any confidence now to talk with her, i'm still embarassed for what happened. And of course, still hurt when she said those words. So as much as possible, i'm distancing myself to her so there's no arguement anymore.

Jieun wants a compelete family and i hate myself because i will not give it to her anymore. She'll have a complete family but to her second daddy, and thinking of that scenario, i feel like my heart is turning into a pieces.

But i'm ready to accept that fact, i will ready myself for that. If Louise will find a guy to give Jieun a complete family, i will completely accept that. I will just focus being a father to Jieun until i die. I will give everything for her happiness.

I went to my room and i took a shower.

*****

"Jieun, what did you talk about?" i asked her.

She looked at me. "Nothing mommy." obviously, she don't want to tell me what they talked about. Hindi ko na lang sya ulit tinanong. Sinuklayan ko ang buhok nya.

"Mommy, if you give me a second daddy. It's okay for me." she smiled sincerely.

And that when i stopped.

"Second daddy? What do you mean?" i asked her.

"I said if you'll find a boyfriend that will be my second daddy. It's okay for me. Kung yun po yung makakapagpa-happy sayo edi happy na rin po ako."

Why is she telling me this?

"Who said i'll find a boyfriend, Jieun?"

"Mommy, it's okay. You don't have to pretend. I know you don't like daddy nor love him and i completely understand that. If one day, you'll find a boyfriend, i'll be happy for you. And i will promise that i will accept him."

"Jieun! I never said that i will find a new boyfriend, what are you saying that?" hindi ko na napigilan at nataasan ko na sya ng boses.

Tumahimik sya at hindi na nagsalita. "Stay here, Jieun."

Lumabas ako ng kwarto at pumunta sa kwarto ni Blaze, hindi na ako nag-atubili na kumatok at agad na binuksan yon. Naabutan ko sya bagong ligo at naka-robe.

*****

"Anong sinabi mo kay Jieun?" she confronted me.

I gave her a confuse look. "What do you mean?"

"Kung ano ano ang pinagsasabi ni Jieun, na kesyo okay lang sa kanya na maghanap ako ng boyfriend o ano. Anong sinabi mo sa kanya hah?!" she shouted.

"I didn't say anything to her." we never talked about that.

"Liar!!" she shouted at me. She's angry at me again.

"Louise, calm down. You don't have to shout."

"How can i fvcking calm down when you're brainwashing Jieun's mind!"

"Hey, i never do that." i defended.

"Nagpapaawa ka. Ginagamit mo si Jieun para magpaawa. Para ano? Para kumasa ako sa mga gusto mo hah? Ganon ba yon? Kaya kung ano ano ang pinagsasabi mo kay Jieun?" and now she's accusing me.

"Stop using Jieun for fvck sake Blaze, wag kang magpa-awa dito! Hindi ka kaawa-awa kahit ngayon ay nagiging mukhang desperado ka na. Stop saying things to Jieun!" she shouted.

I looked pitiful and desperate? So that's how she see me right now. I never brainwashed Jieun. And i'm not using her. I just explained at her what is happening so that she can understand. I can't blame Jieun if she said those words, but i'm thankful because she can understand me. But i never used her to be look pitiful.

I just sighed. "Okay, i'm sorry for that." i said in a low tone. She slammed my door and left me in my room.

I sighed. Game over. I'm sorry Jieun. I'm really sorry. Daddy did his best, but his best is not enough. I'm sorry.