Hermitcraft Oneshots

You've got to be KIDding me (1)

"Great!" Pix said, "how are we supposed to get there?"

"Hop on a plane or something, I guess?" Zloy said, shrugging.

He tried to reach something on the top shelf, but because of his short stature he couldn't reach.

Pix grabbed the box of Oreos Zloy was reaching for and passed it off to the small version of his friend. "No, that won't work." He said. "You don't exactly match your passport."

Zloy took three cookies and passed the box back off to Pix to put back. "Hm. We could drive."

"Road trip from Paris to Moscow? Sounds fun." Pix mused.

"Got a better idea?" Zloy asked, taking apart the two halves of his first Oreo.

"No, I suppose not." Pix sighed. "But there has to be a better way to do this."

"Probably! But we haven't had bonding time in forever. Plus I mix chemicals for a shady business and you're a voice actor, it's not like we can't take a few days off." Zloy quipped, popping the cream-less half of the Oreo into his mouth.

"I- see your point," Pix grumbled at the absurd circumstances he had found himself in.
———

They were set for the trip.

They had a weeks worth of clothes, money for the both of them, snacks,- lots of snacks- and all the various essentials.

"Road trip!" Zloy said, cheering from the backseat as they drove out of Paris. He had wanted to sit in the front, to which Pix said he could when they were out of the city and away from the prying eyes of the cops.

"Yes, Zloy, road trip. Just remember, if anyone asks your my son and we're driving to meet your mother in Russia." Pix coached, turning a sharp corner as the traffic started to thin out.

"Yeah, yeah," Zloy murmured, craning his neck to look out the window.

After a few minutes of silent driving, Zloy decided that it was boring and took out his phone.

The next hour or so they drove silently, with the occasional frustrated yell into the windshield and quip about shitty driving.

Eventually they had gotten out of the city center, and Zloy was able to move up to the front seat.

There he chewed noisily into Pixl's ear, played obnoxiously loud YouTube videos, and constantly teased Pixl about this that and everything.

After five Soviet Union National anthem sing-alongs, Pix snapped.

"That is it! One more noise from you and I'll take your phone away and you can stare out the bloody window until we get to Moscow!" Pix said authoritatively.

"Your not my dad," Zloy said. "I may look eight but I'm still an adult!"

"I don't think you ever were. So unless you want to sit back there without your phone for another week I suggest you plug some fucking headphones in!" Pix snapped, nearly loosing control of the car.

That shocked Zloy. Pix never swore unless he was really, really pissed. "S-Sorry," Zloy said, reaching into his bag and pulling out a pair of headphones.

They spent the next five or so hours in awkward silence, night had fallen and Pix was pulling into a drive through so they could get something to eat and he could get some caffeine into his system.

Pix looked beside him to see what Zloy wanted, but the boy was asleep.

He ordered a burger with fries and a coffee for himself, and a kids meal with orange juice for Zloy.

He nudged Zloy awake, sitting in the car park with the engine still humming.

Pix handed the sleeping boy the bag with his food, "sorry for before.." he said quietly.

Zloy rubbed his eyes and took the bag, unscrewing the cap to his juice. "It's ok, I shouldn't have been so obnoxious."

"Eat, we'll drive until we find a motel or something. Might be a bit so hang in there." He murmured lowly, shoving a fry into his mouth.

"Mmk," Zloy drawled, yawning. He may have mentally been an adult, but physically he had all the same needs as an eight year old. Sleep, nutrition, and otherwise.

After Pix had finished his food, they hopped back on the road.

Zloy has stolen Pix's fries, and was halfway through eating them when he had fallen asleep again.

Pix kept one eye on the road, and one eye on Zloy, a small smile on his face.

If nothing else, this little trip would be a great bonding experience.
———

Part two when I'm not swamped with work lol

Anyway full credit to Jeina58 for the idea~

I have a stories I want to write but I have a chem test tomorrow that I am wholly unprepared for so-

-yours, horrible at time management