Remember when we went on tour together and fell in love, and then we wrote a song about it.
Thats the life of a popstar.
"And I'm well aware I write too many songs about you
And the coffee's out
At the Beachwood Café
And it kills me 'cause I know...
I hopped in my car and gave Curtis a short wave before driving away. As I drove, I admired the dusty streets of Los Angeles, while humming along to the Ed Sheeran song that was playing. It was weird that Los Angeles had become such a home and comfort for me over the last year. It was nice to know all my friends were here and that they have been through it all with me.
Not only had my fanbase grown, but I met a lot of new friends too, which I was super grateful for. When I was tour with Harry, Kathrine had got a new job and met a couple of new people, while I was gone. I met them at a super bad timing though. When I got home, I was in trauma and tears from the horrific situation with Harry. All I wanted to do was lay in my bed and cry for days, which I did end up doing. When I walked through the door, I was met with Kathrine and two other girls, who were looking at me with a surprised but confused face. I understood though, I wasn't suppose to me home till the next day. It was not the best way to meet them, but after all three of them forced me to spill everything and threaten to beat up Harry themselves, I knew deep down they would be great friends.
Harry...
It was so hard to not think of him. Even with me running around singing and performing like I always dreamed of, my mind always went back to him. It sucked. I knew deep down that I was over him, but it was still hard thinking of how it all went down and having no closure or contact for that matter.
After a couple of days, Harry had tried to call me, which just made me spiral out of control again in tears. I remember Kathrine taking my phone away from me for days, which wasn't a big deal since I was doing absolutely nothing.
When she gave me my phone back, I saw that Harry had left me a voicemail. It took all of me to not listen to it, but I couldn't bring myself to delete it. Even over a year, I still haven't deleted the voice mail or listened to it. I was always tempted to, but I couldn't bring myself to. I had come so far, from crying everyday to being able to get out and enjoy myself. To have fun and enjoy life. Even if the situation sucked I learned a lot from it, I never wanted to waste a moment in my life. Life was super short and I wanted to live it the best way I could. So there the voicemail was, hiding away in my phone for me to delete hopefully one day.
I was brought out of thoughts, by a loud horn. I looked next to me to see a driver trying to cut me off. Ugh, welcome to Los Angeles traffic. I flipped the guy off, before continuing my drive back home.
I continued to listen to the radio, but my eyebrows furrowed together as I listened at the woman's voice through my cars speakers.
"The handsome man himself, Harry Styles new album comes out tomorrow so make in sure you listen and here is the number one song by the man himself, Lights Up."
"What do you mean?
I'm sorry by the way
Never coming back down
Can't you see?"
As the catchy song started to play, I quickly turned it off, before trying to calm myself down and continuing to drive back home to my flat.
I started to think about Harrys album as I continued my long drive. What would it be about? What is the title? Will it be good? I knew that Harry was coming out with an album obviously, but I have done my best to avoid all articles about the album in general.
It is still so weird to me how much life has changed and how things were still the same. For me things have changed drastically, but Harry was still releasing songs that I was sure were going to be incredible.
Even if I had my own grudges against the man himself, his music was brilliant and heart felt. It would be hard to not listen to the album, but I have tried my hardest to get all thoughts of the British popstar out of my head and one album wasn't going to stop that.
Things have changed and I was no longer a clingy lovesick girl for Harry Styles. No, I was an independent woman, who was doing absolutely amazing without him.
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6.8 million likes/82, 876 comments
{sydney.cross} I hope it was worth it fucking Josslyn
fanaccount- gorgeous
lovelysyd- I LOVE YOU
kathrine.scott- thats my best friend!
hater- get over it, no one cares about you
gigihadid- gorgeous darling
harryfan- I still ship you and Harry
taylorswift- Is that new music that I know I am going to love??!
Wahoo, we are over half way done with the book and I wanted to thank you all so much for the support, it means the world and makes me feel all giddy, hehe!
I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and I hope you all are still staying safe and washing your hands!
TREAT PEOPLE WITH KINDESS and I'm out till next chapter!
:)
-Lexie xx
(also Josslyn is by Olivia O'Brien and I suggest you listen, its super good)
