Chasing Sofia

Chapter 19 - The Conditions

This already feels so different from usual, and I can sense that something has changed among us. It almost feels palpable and it makes me extremely nervous.

"Sofia, I need to tell you something. Actually, a few things. But before I tell you, I need you to know that I wanted to tell you since the beginning. I should have told you all this a while ago, before I took it so far and I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you," he says regretfully.

I nod, already knowing what he's going to say. That we should have never gotten involved in the first place and that he's breaking up with me. I desperately hold the tears in while I prepare myself to hear the words out loud.

He takes a deep breath and shakes his head. "When your parents offered for me to stay here, there were two conditions your dad gave me. The first one was to stay away from you," he says looking at me full of remorse.

"My dad actually said that to you?" I ask incredulously.

"I tried, Sofia. I really did. I stopped writing to you, I convinced myself that I hated you for leaving, I started hooking up with other girls to try to forget you. But then you came back and I realized that none of that worked. If anything, I wanted you even more and I couldn't stay away and I'm sorry. I went against your dad's wishes and my better judgment."

What?

"Adrian, it's not your fault. That was both of us. I just don't know why my dad would want you to stay away from me, but maybe it's for the best."

"I just think that if we could show him, he might change his mind. I like to think that I am good for you, that I can make you happy. Because I've seen it and that's all I want. I want you to be happy, Sofia. I'll do whatever it takes. I'll move out, find my own place, and then maybe he'll allow us to be together."

My heart stops at his words. I wasn't expecting that at all. "Oh, I ..."

"Wait, what did you think I was going to say right now?" Adrian asks frowning.

I shake my head and look down from him.

"Please tell me, Sofia," he says, looking distraught.

"I thought you were going to break up with me," I admit in a small voice.

"Sofia ..." his voice falls flat. "Is that ... is that what you want?" he whispers.

"No, Adrian. Of course not. I just thought –"

He immediately breaks the distance between us and brings me to his lap. "It appears I haven't been very clear with you and I'm sorry I've made you feel that way," he says.

I rest my hands on his chest, not knowing exactly what to do with his sudden proximity.

"Baby, look at me," he tells me. He waits before I meet his eyes and says, "I love you, Sofia. I'm so in love with you and I've been so for years. You asked me once how I knew I wasn't in love before, and the answer is you. All I had to do was look at you to know what that really meant. And somehow by some miracle, you're my girlfriend now and I would never break up with you. Because I want everything with you, and I want it forever."

My arms instantly wrap around his neck, hugging him with my life. I'm so happy I want to cry. I want to cry so badly, but I know if I do I won't be able to stop and I'll turn into a blubbering mess. "I'm so in love with you, Adrian," I say against his neck. "I've only ever wanted to be with you and you are so good for me. I can feel it. You make me so happy."

He kisses my shoulder and around my neck until he reaches my lips and takes my mouth. He kisses me so expertly, it's so incredibly slow and tender one moment, and fast and urgent the next. I want everything with him too and I can't wait to give myself entirely to him. I'm so ready to take this next step with him and become a woman in his eyes.