Ruby Red Threads

#10 Ren

I glare at him with my hands stuffed in my pockets, but Amari simply waves him off. "I'm totally okay; don't worry about it."

He nods gratefully, and I think that he's finally about to leave when his gaze reluctantly shifts my way. Ah shit, here we fucking go again. "Hey Ichijou, so I... I watched you run yesterday, and you were so fast, man. And I guess I have to ask. Do you want to play with us? We could use—"

"No," I snap. I'm not good with groups. I can't be a part of a team. It just never works out. One day they're all falling over themselves, inviting me to join in the game, and the next, they're fighting about who should be the one to tell me to leave. And I'm sick of it. I'm sick of it all. "How many times do I have to tell you people? I'm not interested, so leave me the fuck alone."

I saunter ahead, leaving Amari behind, knowing full well what she's going to say next.

I'm sorry; please don't mind him.

He's always like this.

You should just ignore him.

"Ren," she calls out loud instead, her voice harsh and authoritative. I freeze. "What was that? Come back here and apologise." It takes me a full moment to process what she just said, and I whirl around, staring at her in quiet disbelief.

"Huh?"

I know that I'm not good at keeping my feelings in check. It's just so fucking hard to go through the incoherent storm in my head and pick out the right words every single time. I can't help but slip up every now and then and say things that I shouldn't, and I know that I could try harder to be nice, but I've just never seen the point of it. Who would I be doing it for? These people who smile and drag me into their midst but cut me out the second it starts to get a little inconvenient? These people, who are always so quick to resign themselves to my behaviour, exchanging awkward glances each time as they watch me walk away?

But...right now, there's this meddlesome girl here, and she's telling me to come back. Nobody's ever done that before.

The guy's eyes dart between us once before he breaks into a smile. "It's okay, it's okay; don't worry about it," he says pleasantly, the stutter gone from his voice. Seriously though, you were awesome on track yesterday, man," he adds, turning around to fully face me. "Having you on the team would be great, so drop by anytime you feel like. See you around!" I stare after him as he runs off, confused.

"Do you always have to be so rude?" Amari grumbles, catching up to me. "It'll give people the wrong idea about you."

Brows crinkling, I stare down at her once more. Why do you care? "I don't understand what the hell you're going on about," I mumble as we walk.

"Oh, please," she mutters. "You're not half as bad as you make yourself out to be. Anyone who stops to look at you for more than one second can see that."

I don't know how to respond, so I quietly lower my gaze to the ground, my feet crunching on the grains of sand as we walk. Amari sighs, and I feel her shift closer, her arm softly bumping into mine. "About what I said the other day," she begins, and I stiffen. "You've gotten to say what you want to. It's only fair you hear her out too, don't you think?" My throat tightens up, and I look away, uncertainty clawing at my heart.

"Hey, it'll work out, okay? You'll see," she says gently, bumping my arm again.

Instead of giving her a proper reply, I take one hand out of my pocket, pointing at the spot on my head where the ball seemed to have hit her earlier. "Does it hurt?" I mumble somewhat awkwardly.

Amari blinks up at me, and an entire minute runs out before she opens her mouth to respond. "Oh, uh, not really?"

"I was right in thinking that you have a thick skull then," I grumble.