gotta get out [billie eilish]

Chapter 6

Six

Muffled talking and the sound of rustling dry grass fill the crisp air. I see a dark figure pacing by a tree that's not too far away. I know it's Billie by the empty space next to me that's still warm.

She must be on the phone to someone. I wonder what the time is, but I lay still.

After a few minutes, the footsteps get closer again. She slides back under the blankets and rolls over. A shiver goes down my spine when my leg brushes against her cold ones that were just exposed to the cool air.

I close my eyes and try to go back to sleep.

***

I wake with a throbbing headache and the sunlight feels like a laser on my eyeballs.

"You should get ready for school," She tells me in monotone, facing away from me.

I feel like shit, so I'm not going. "Fuck school," I respond, expecting her to smile but she doesn't.

"I hate school," She confesses.

"Then don't go," I shrug.

"I have to. For my grades," She contemplates.

I've already offered, but why not say it again. "Billie," I start, "I'll teach you."

She looks at me hesitantly for a few moments before saying, "Okay."

I observe the way she grabs her books from her school bag and organises then on the basketball court, which we use because its a hard surface to write against.

We spend a few hours on the court under the sun. Our legs are sprawled out in every direction, with pens and paper scattered everywhere. Every now and then I feel her foot tap my own as she solves a problem. Gets frustrated when it takes her a long time to get something, chewing on the end of her pen as she attempts to figure it out. She listens patiently as I explain things.

"Where have you been?" A stern voice questions me the second I open the door. My mom stands in the middle of the room with her arms crossed and a look of disapproval. When I don't respond she talks again, "Why haven't you been coming home? And I know you weren't at school today." After taking in my appearance she adds, "Look at you."

"I've been seeing people that actually support me," I sneer. I was going to go for the sit and nod approach but I changed my mind.

My mom gasps, "What's that supposed to mean?"

As if my dad can sense the tension in the room, he enters from the kitchen.

"What if I want a girlfriend?" I ask, feeling myself becoming emotional. I'm in pain from the constant headache all day, and tears threaten to spill from my eyes.

My parents look baffled. My mom opens her mouth to say something but is speechless.

"Exactly," I spit, "Don't tell me I can't be around people who make me happy."

I start to head towards my room but I'm stopped in the doorway. "You're grounded," My mom tells me, and I roll my eyes. "Come straight home after school and no going out at night."

As soon as I move out I can make my own decisions. I go to my bed, crawling under the covers and bringing the grey jacket I let Billie borrow up to my pillow. I don't care if it's creepy - it smells like her and I breathe in the scent and fall asleep.

I don't know how long it's been, but when I started sleeping the sun was shining brightly and now its pitch black. Someone taps on my window again. I thought I imagined it before. I sit up and look straight outside through my open curtains, to see Billie standing on the other side of the glass. Her hood is up and bits of hair stick out at her shoulders. Her eyes look darker than normal, like she's wearing makeup.

I search for my phone, fumbling until my hands find it. It's just after midnight. And how did she even know which room was mine?

I open my window as slowly as possible to make the least sound. "Hey," I smile.

She returns it and informs me, "We're going out."

"Where?" I question. What would even be open at this time?

"I'm not telling," She teases. I look at her sceptically for a moment before deciding that I trust her.

"Okay, just let me grab my car keys," I whisper.

"You won't need them. We're catching the train."

I follow her to the station, my hand in hers, and we get on the first train that comes. The carriage only has a few people on it. I wait for her to drop my hand but she holds onto it tightly.

An old man, tired and worn out, leaves his stare on us for a little too long. I try to ignore, but when Billie notices she glares at the man and he looks away instantly.

The only other lady on the carriage gets off at her stop. Billie turns to the man. "Do you have a problem?" She says it calmly and quietly, but her tone has so much attitude and venom.

"I'm sorry for offending you," The man tells us, then gestures to our intertwined fingers. "Makes me happy to see that."

I make eye contact with Billie, and she looks away, smiling.

The next stop is a busy one, because multiple groups of young people file onto the train, raising the volume and filling the air with talk and laughter. The man glances out the window and doesn't make an effort to talk to us again. Billie drops my hand, but keeps her shoulder pressed against mine.

She leads me to a building full of people and the potent stench of alcohol. It's lit up by yellow tinted lights, with a large bar along the left wall. Tables are scattered thought out the space, and only half are occupied.

A mob of dancing, intoxicated people move in an open area in front of the stage that takes up the back of the room. The loud drums and electric guitar being played pierce my ears before I'm used to the loud sound. Billie looks unfazed.

The song finishes, and everyone claps as the band makes their way off stage. The cheers of the audience get even louder when a new group with three members enter the platform.

I glance and Billie and her face is lit up and full of awe. This must be the band she wanted to see. She drags me into the crowd, which would usually cause an instant wave of discomfort from walking through a room full of eyes, but I'm unable to put my focus anywhere other than Billie.

She doesn't stop pushing through people until we are at the front, restricted by a hip-height metal bar, preventing people from getting onto the walkway that resides directly in front of the stage.

The lead singer excitedly asks the crowd who wants to join her on stage. I look around at everyone curiously. No one seems to be volunteering, however everyone has eager faces.

"Her!" I hear Billie shout and spin in her direction. My face reddens when I realise she is staring at the singer and pointing in my direction. The artist grins at me. Fuck.

If you can be bothered voting, it helps a lot <3