gotta get out [billie eilish]

Chapter 3

Three

"Hello?" I answer, holding the phone up to my ear.

"What are you doing?" I recognise Kai's deep voice and he adds, "Wanna hang out right now?"

"Nah, I'm busy," I respond, taking a quick glance at Billie. She's already giving me her full attention, not trying in any way to be discrete about listening to my conversation with Kai. There's nothing stopping me from seeing my best friend right now, but I just want to be here. And I don't know what that means.

He lets out a loud groan and reprimands me. "You never see us anymore!"

"Bye Kai," I chuckle and hang up.

As I put my hand in my pocket I feel the cool wind on my bare arm and pull some more of the blanket over me. Considering we are sitting on the floor, this is surprisingly comfortable. Billie seems to have this little system down pat. I wonder if there is another reason she comes here often.

"That your boyfriend?" She asks casually. Whether she is singing or speaking her voice is inimitable and calming and gentle, but holds so much emotion. I don't think I could ever get sick of it.

"Nah. I'm uh, not really into guys," I explain, scrutinising her reaction. She looks unfazed.

"Fair enough," She smiles. "Have you heard of this place - fuck I forgot the name - that's like a haunted house and a fast food place at the same time?"

I stare at her like she's a crazy person. Her excitement around the subject forces me to crack a smile. "I have no clue what you're talking about," I say, starting to laugh.

She joins in, defending herself through chuckles, "Sounds weird but its fucking dope. I went there once and never got to go back."

I try to imagine an ten year old who lights up at the idea of a haunted house and fail. "I'm guessing you love horror movies and scary stories too?"

"Sure do," She smiles. "Anyway, I really want to go there again, but my mom won't take me."

"We should go together." The words spill from my mouth without a thought, surprising the both of us.

"We should," Is all she says, before laying her head back onto the pillow. Her long eyelashes shelter her eyes - pale blue under the light of the moon - as they wander the sky. One of her fingers repeatedly taps the blanket lightly, as if she's singing a song her head. "You're staring at me," She nonchalantly.

"Sorry," I mumble and quickly mimic her position. We lay like that for hours.

***

"Are you awake?" Billie whispers.

Of course I'm awake. I'm used to hearing my dad's TV playing in the background and the continuous mechanical sounds of the fan that runs all night because my mom hates summer. I'm not used to the silence that is only interrupted by gentle leaves brushing together in the breeze.

"Yes," I say. I turn to the side and can see her more clearly than I could a few hours ago. Maybe my eyes are just more adjusted to the dark.

"Do you have to go home?" She asks me. Her face is expressionless and unreadable.

"No," I half lie. I should go home. I'm gonna get a lecture for this in the morning but it's okay. My parents will drop it if I just say I stayed at a friend's.

"Do you want to go home?" She doesn't break eye contact as she waits patiently for a response.

"No," I tell her, honestly this time. I never want to leave.

***

I find myself scanning the crowd of people that all simultaneously file into the cafeteria and chatter about their days. I already knew Billie doesn't go to this school, I was just hoping I was wrong.

I feel two hands press firmly against my shoulders and I spin around to see Dylan grinning stupidly.

"What are you so happy about?" I question him.

"Kai has a girlfriend," He tells me, which is the last thing I expect him to say.

"I do not," Kai huffs. I go wide eyed when I hear his voice, and follow it to an eating Kai sitting at the table closest to us. I didn't even see him there before.

Dylan visibly rolls his eyes. "If you facetime the same person every night and say 'she isn't that good looking' every single time I point out a hot chick to you, then you have a girlfriend."

I pull a chair out and plop myself onto it, still tired from the lack of sleep I got last night. Billie and I talked for ages, and when we weren't I was just thinking. When I left in the morning to get ready for school she was asleep.

I rest my head in my hands and let my eyes close, listening to Kai and Dylan bicker, hoping one of them will ask me about the mysterious girl from the park.

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