My Silent Fable (Riolu X Zorua)

That Hollow Moon

'I'm just happy to see you smile again!'

Lily's words bounced off the walls of my brain. Happy to see me smile again. Even though the smile... was fake?

My vacant gaze sunk far into the depths of my bowl. Noodles floated like limp bones, an empty vessel, its essence, centre and purpose, long forgotten.

My consciousness drifted back to my evening meal at the sound of Dad's gentle chuckling. He waited a moment then looked at me. His muzzle was painted with a sad smile.

"You look like someone died."

I deadpanned and blinked slowly.

With a drop of the jaw and a waving of paws he realised what he'd said. "Sorry, I didn't mean... I, I didn't-" He paused and sighed, rubbing his temples - "I'm sorry, Rose. I'm no good with this stuff, it was your Mother's department."

I nodded sadly and dragged my spoon through the noodles.

"I miss your Mother," Dad said suddenly, "I remember her laugh and how her smile could make anything seem better. Yeah, when it came to her, I wore rose coloured lenses, and they never fell because to me she was perfect."

Dad sighed and was quiet for a moment. All this talk of Mum, I could feel my eyes misting over and tears gathering.

"Remember how she used to call you Rosie?" Dad asked with a smile. "You loved it when she called you that. You were her beautiful little Rosie-" He paused again before reaching across the table and taking my paw gently in his - "Rose, it's okay to miss people. I know, I know it hurts, and it sucks that people die, but they do, and it is okay to miss them. You don't have to let them go, you can hold them close, locked away in your heart, but you can't stay chained to them. Promise me you won't be bound by pain, because it's not what anyone wants for you."

I lifted my crestfallen head, gazing into his earnest eyes. I nodded over and over. "I promise." My voice was little more than a hoarse whisper, but it was enough. Dad breathed a pained laugh and I saw his eyes fill with big wet tears.

"I love you, Rose, and I'm proud to call you my daughter."

At his words the tides of emotion I'd been holding back surged forwards, spilling everywhere. I began sobbing, quietly at first, but then I was bawling and had fallen from my chair.

Dad swooped down, cradling me in his arms and we just sat there together, on the floor and I cried every tear I have held back.

Through the window a hollow moon glistened upon a small house; shining through the window and illuminating a bowl of forgotten noodles which slowly grew cold.

******

I lay on my bed, arms folded across my chest and paws sitting one over the other. The night was warm, and I rested atop the covers. My head moulded into the soft pillow, casting my eyes toward the ceiling. My gaze was vacant and mind still, but I thought with a chaotic slowness.

What Dad had said, I can keep them in my heart, but I can't be chained by them. I don't know how to do that. I wish everyone would stop speaking in riddles and just... read me a fable.

A sad smile lifted my cheeks and I remembered his warm grin, full of life. He was full of mischief, just like Mum. She loved making people laugh. She was always the funniest person in the room, nothing less.

Thinking of them like this, remembering them in this fond light, it's like they're still with me. I can't put it into words, so don't ask me to, but to those who have lived long enough, you know what I'm talking about. You know what it's like to finally accept that they're gone, removed from seemingly everything but your memory. You know what it's like to know that you'll be okay, or you may know what it's like to hope you'll be okay.

As for me, I hope I'll be okay. I'm sure I will be one day, but until then, I can only smile. I can be like that hollow moon, and shine despite being empty. I don't doubt that it will hurt, but it will be worth it in the end because after all these years, that moon still glows.

Fable could never teach me how to make illusions, but I've learned to throw up a façade; one that is painfully believable and one that will last until I become solid, until I feel again. I'm not giving up; I'm keeping them with me and learning how to unlock the shackles.

As I glanced out the window I smiled sadly and tilted my head. I looked past the stars to what lay beyond and thought to myself, that really is a hollow moon.