Without Darkness ✓

6 ~ Drapetomania

***Drapetomania/noun/an overwhelming urge to run away***

Nyx

I woke to sunlight entering the window that had caused so much of a conundrum just the night before. Straight away, my mind drew a blank: and then I remembered. Everything. Cliché, I know, but it felt like recovering from memory loss, as all the memories flew back in an array of colour and sense and time. The window. The bitter cold of nighttime air. The roof... the ground. The pain. It was surreal to think that it could have actually happened.

What the hell was I thinking?

I groaned and pushed myself slowly into a sitting position, wincing as I felt all the places on my body where I had self-inflicted injury. I must have slept on the floor all night, wiped out from anguish and exhaustion, and I woke up with a small puddle of blood at my feet, dirtied, and hurting all over.

From my position on the floor, I got up slowly until I was standing, wincing again at the pain originating from my bruised and bloodied feet. I was acutely aware of the pain elsewhere, but that wasn't my main focus; I had to clean up myself and this mess before Lady Blanwen found out. From a quick glance out the open window, I could tell it was early, as the minimal sun rays were low and shone directly in my eyesight. Early, yes - but early enough to finish before anyone else woke up? Only time could tell.

I headed out of my room, glad that I had taken the time to lock my door last night, and rushed downstairs as quickly as is possible without tripping oneself up. All I needed was to go outside, fetch water, and head back. Aware that any one of our house staff could be awake and emerge at any time to see me in this state, I raced to the back door, all the while feeling like I was stepping on pins. I noticed the door: shut, the key not in sight. Oh no. I must have dropped the key last night. Did someone now know that the door had been entered from outside?

My mind was racing as I pulled on the handle, expecting it to open; but it wouldn't budge. Frantic, I twisted it again, tucking a dark lock of hair behind my ear in frustration. Checking that the key definitely wasn't present, I took a small step back and pulled on it with both hands. Come on, come on, come on...

"It's a well known fact, Nyx, that doors need a key to open."

My heart stopped, just for a second. I closed my eyes and cried internally as my hands dropped uselessly from the handle to my sides. This was not happening.

"Looking for this?" Lady Blanwen said sweetly as I turned around to face her. In her hand was the key, the one I must have dropped last night, having been cleaned of dirt and gleaming at me: mocking.

I had to force a thankful smile onto my face. "Yes, thank you." I leant forwards to take it, but clearly today I wasn't getting off that easily.

"Uh-uh," she said, drawing her hand back. "Now, Nyx, I'm not sure I want you to go outside today."

I swallowed quietly. "And why is that?"

"See, last night we had an intruder. Yes, you heard right. And they came in and left through this door, and I fear they still wait outside at this very moment."

Oh Gods. The overly-sweet sarcasm was evident in her voice: she knew. She knew.

"I'm sure they would have left by now."

"Dear Nyx, don't you understand?" Her voice grew ever more high-pitched and innocent, and I didn't miss the glance she took down at my ruined appearance. "I care so deeply for you that I wouldn't want to risk it. In fact - I might just have to - oh dear." She held the rusty key in the grasp of both hands and, seemingly with minimal effort, she snapped it in two. Clean. Straight. I winced as it split in front of my very eyes.