Shrek x Danny Devito

The meeting

Strolling through the park on a damp autumn evening, Danny, who was the most handsome man you'd ever see, was day dreaming of the day he would meet his significant other. His perfect man would be tall, green and nearly as handsome as himself. Suddenly, there was a ear splitting yell from behind his sexy head. 'ONIONS HAVE LAYERS.' was shouted extremely loud. Before he even knew it, a tall, green and nearly handsome as Danny figure appeared in front of him. Danny's dream man! He must have been dreaming. All of a sudden, the green figure asked for Danny's name. He very anxiously responded with, 'Danny, Danny Devito.'

'DANNY DEVITO?!' The smexy man screamed, 'that's a right good name, that!' Danny was of course very surprised in a good way about this as he had already developed a massive crush on him. 'What's your name?' He awkwardly responded.
'Shrek!' Said the dreamy man.
'Do have a boyfriend?' Danny nervously asked.
'Of course! A hot hunk like me can't get them off me! And of course girls come for me too but I'm gay. I've actually had a wife that I recently broke up with who was as green as me! I loved her but I just couldn't let my feelings for Rodrick keep me captive anymore. She asked why if I was married to a woman and I like boys, no men, as well, why I couldn't be bisexual. But I just told her that I wasn't really feeling it for girls anymore, you know what I'm saying?
'Yes! I know exactly what you're saying! Like why can't women accept us the way we are?' Danny was pleasantly surprised to hear that Shrek was gay! But, he had a boyfriend. Of course he did! He was the sexiest man around!
'Do you want to come to my house?' Shrek asked, which once again left Danny pleasantly surprised. 'Well, duh! Hell yeah I do!'