Lionheart (HP universe FF) / (Marauders era)

Chapter 19. The Truth Will Always Hurt the Most

I let out a deep breath and pushed aside my plate, gaining attention from Lily, who had also witnessed the scene and was now looking at me worriedly. "Don't mind them," she tried to ease my uneasiness.

My arms crossed I looked at her. "How can I not mind about them, when they are the ones I'm thinking about all the time. You wouldn't understand my uneasiness, because you weren't the one to lie to them."

"I know...but-...look," she huffed and started again. "What happened at the Black Lake happened so quickly. You and Severus had only just become true friends again and the trust you had once lost was now back. He's your friend, just like James and Sirius are. He means a lot to you, just like those two. And defending your friend is not a bad thing to do Aurora."

"And that's something I know myself...and it's not what is causing me to feel like this...to feel all this guilt. It's the fact that I hid something important from the people I truly care about," I admitted, looking down at my hands that were resting on the table.

"I understand, I truly do. Because I too hid something rather important from James. Things have been going so well between the two of us this past year...and that's why I was so afraid to tell him that I had decided to give in to something from my past. I hadn't told about the decision to anyone else than you, because I knew you would understand why I had decided to forgive Severus after all. And that also gives me mixed feelings about James, because he should know me that well to know that I don't want to have bad blood with anyone. Yes Severus hurt me with one of the only ways he could, and yes I was devastated about it. But that was years ago, and I know that both of us have grown up and changed."

I studied her green eyes gently. "You are right. And I'm sorry that I dragged you into all this...I bet I completely messed up something special between you and James."

This made Lily blush gently about the thought of what had actually happened before all this at the Black Lake. James had indeed confessed to her, and just before she was able to express anything, it had all been delayed by this. "No it's...want to leave and go back to the common room?" she suggested, which I agreed on immediately.

And with that the two of us started walking out from the Great Hall, down the hallways of Hogwarts, while making sure that we could talk confidently, for there were hardly any students wondering around at a time like this.

Lily was looking down at the ground and our feet as we walked onwards, thinking about her words and thoughts carefully. "I don't know how much you heard him saying back then-"

"Almost everything," I confessed, not wanting to lie to her as well.

She chuckled a bit embarrassed and blushed a little. "Right...well, after the game I went to congratulate him of the way he had played and that his team had won. He was so happy and thrilled that it felt like all the barriers that normally held him back from actually doing anything, were now completely gone. He seemed so free and careless...but in a good way. And I think just the mood, and everything were perfect for his confession. And it was all so perfect."

To be honest I was still somewhat surprised by what she was saying, even though I had called her feeling something towards James from the very beginning. But to know that she was actually feeling so strongly towards him was...amazing.

"I have know James for a long time, not as long as you, but still. From the very first moment I saw him, he always made me feel in a certain way. When we were younger he always got on my nerves, making me want to shout at him almost because of anything basically," she chuckled, also making me smile. "He always got on my nerves and made me feel irritated...but he was also always able to make me smile in a way no one else was. And even then I think that his way of making me feel...was something special. Yes he has always been my friend and he will always be my friend...but not the same type of a friend like you or Remus are. For he is the only one that can make me feel like this...which only tells me that all the feelings I'm feeling towards him...are love."