Trapped

Chapter 33

Jeong-Hui

I saw Dong-Min freaking out and as much as I wanted to go on the ride I didn't want Dong-Min to be scared, but my selfish need took over me. I desperately wanted to tell Dong-Min, "It's okay if you don't want to go on the ride with me." 

"I have something to tell you," Dong-Min told me. An uncomfortable feeling nipped away at my stomach.

What if he was going to tell me that I was selfish for forcing him to go on the ride with me? Or if he was going to tell me that I'm a horrible friend for forcing him to go on? Or worst of all he was going to tell me he didn't like me or worst of all he hated me

Except it was the complete opposite and he told me he loved me.

Those three words kept spiraling in my head...

I. Love. You

That nostalgic feeling immediately brought me to when I was in primary school and how, before we were friends I was obsessed with making Dong-Min feel miserable.

I remember being his bully but instead of taking it he would not only fight back but he would fight back respectfully. He was the kindest and most confident kid in our class and I wanted to break it.

I wanted to break him down and show him, life isn't so beautiful but when his walls broke I realized he already knew life wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. He knew life wasn't so beautiful ever since he experienced it first hand with the death of his mother and I just added fuel to the fire.

How do you act around someone who've you bullied for a whole year whose mother just died. For the first time of ever meeting him, I was kind to him and for the first time of my life I learned the repercussions of my actions, he truly exploded my walls.

That nostalgic feeling still lingering brought me to when I was a kid and hanging out with Dong-Min. It was such a bittersweet feeling, the happy moments when we were eating food or laughing was so sweet but the baggage both of us held was equally bitter. 

I always thought that love was putting someone on a pedestal. When I was dating Si-Woo it had become a process where he was always correct, I was always wrong, and Si-Woo was this perfect god. Now, when I see Dong-Min I don't see this powerful person, I see Dong-Min, a human being, a precious person in my heart, and my first love...

Love. 

Did I just say I loved him? 

Do I truly love him?

I'm never my true selfish self when I'm with Dong-Min. I'm better, I'm nice and I feel like he makes me better and I love him for that...

I love him. 

I really do love him.

My heart began beating faster than my fleeting thoughts.

The roller coaster started and I could hear screams from all the riders including Dong-Min. He leaned his head against my shoulder and squeezed my hand. The whole time my body was limp, I felt so shocked and ecstatic that I felt as if I had no control over my body.

I love you. He told me he loved me. Dong-Min, Lee Dong-Min loves me.

I squeezed his hand as tightly as I could and told him, "Dong-Min I love you too."

I felt as if he didn't hear me and as the ride picked up in speed and others kept screaming I turned to Dong-Min and yelled, "I love you so much!"

Did I actually confess my feelings towards him?

I felt on cloud nine and as the ride dropped I rose my hands up and screamed in joy as a euphoric feeling overcame me. 

When I got off the ride, the euphoric feeling fleeted immediately, I was brought down to earth and my nerves sparked. The feeling of nervousness was more present than ever and I couldn't even look in Dong-Min's direction.