Destroy Me [ ON HIATUS/TODOROKI ]

[ 07. ]

He stopped walking, his back still turned to her.

"It's alright. I know what you meant."

Todoroki felt the warmth of her finger tips dance across his ice cold hand. Don't freeze. Don't let it out of control. He couldn't look at her face. There wasn't fear anymore— just worry and softness. He didn't want fear, but he didn't want her to be close. She wasn't his to have, she didn't have a choice. He let go.

"Don't do that again."

She let go, her hand practically blue. She retracted her hand, pulling it close to her chest. Emotion welled up in her chest and she let out a stuttering exhale. "I-I'm— I'm s-sorry. I forget myself."

He heard the door shut softly behind him. Why?! Why did father do this?! I can't— I can't handle this. He moved toward the window, rain drowning out the thoughts in his mind. He looked down at his hands, flames erupting in one, ice creeping up the other. He had to push her away. He had let her get too close.

Asami stared out the window in her room, curling up on the chair she didn't know he sat in. Tears dripped down her face as she pulled up her knees to her chest, nestling her face deep into the soft silk. I'm trying so hard, Mom. I'm trying to make him happy but I can't. If he doesn't like me, they'll cut off the money. I— I don't know what to do.

Todoroki tried to calm himself down, regretting everything. Why didn't he just let his sister get married?! What was so hard about that?! Why did he always have to step in— why couldn't he just stop being the hero.

He wasn't the hero, at least, not to Asami. He had to figure out a way for them to come to an understanding. He had to understand why she was there, maybe then they could reach normalcy. Todoroki paced as the torrential rain fall thundered and whirled outside.

Asami had moved away from the window. Though she could create wind storms, she was terrified of thunderstorms. A strange fear. She fled to the bathroom, shutting herself up in the bathtub, no water running. Fear, anguish, anxiety. He wasn't cruel, why couldn't they just talk? Become friends.

Friends.

She couldn't become friends with him. They would eventually be married, she would have to carry his children. What was she going to do? Pretend like that was never happening? Sing and dance alone in the room, forgetting her duty as a future wife and the eldest.

She covered her ears at the sound of thunder, rolling over in the bathtub, feeling her sobs echo around the porcelain.

Her mother died the night of one of Japan's biggest storms. Her death was clouded in black clouds and bad omens. Things in the bathroom floated, carried by a gentle wind, swirling in circles. Asami didn't know what to do, sitting up and watching brushes, pins, hand mirrors circle around her. Towels and wash cloths.

She held on to the back of her head, rocking back and forth. Please, please, make it stop.

Todoroki had sat down on the couch, holding his hands together hoping they would counter balance each other. He was thinking. All he could do was think. His knee bounced up and down.

He should go in there. Tell her they were leaving Japan. Running away. No, no. They couldn't do that. She had a family.

No, he would walk in there and tell her that everything was going to be okay and they would figure it out together.

No, no. That's not right. He couldn't even formulate the right words, so he took out a notepad, writing versions of his declaration over and over again. Hours had passed by as he tried to perfect what he was going to say. The storm finally receded.

He opened the door, leaving the notebook on the coffee table. She wasn't in the bedroom, but the bathroom was shut. He knocked on the bathroom door, but there was no response. So, he gently turned the knob, looking inside.

He couldn't see her, just her hand over the side of the bathtub. Everything was strewn around the room, like a tornado had whipped through. Todoroki slowly stepped toward the bath tub and there she was.

She had fallen asleep in the bathtub, her face red and puffy. The hand that reached out for him was clutched close to her chest. All of the words he had carefully crafted together shattered. He leaned down, picking her up from the bathtub in his arms.

"I'm sorry."

He walked to the bed, her body warm and light in his arms. He laid her down, making sure her head hit the pillow. She sniffed in her sleep, her face contorting. Her hand clutched his sleeve and wouldn't let go.

He knew she was dreaming, but it hurt his heart. She didn't deserve this. It wasn't like him to be so mean to someone in need.

He unfolded each finger, laying it at her side. Todoroki pulled out a blanket. He covered her, making sure she was alright. Then, he turned out the light.

How was this going to work if he only felt happiness when she did?