Forgotten Love

Chapter one

Hey guys, I'm super nervous to share this and I'll probably end up deleting it but I'm actually kind of proud of this story so far. Soo I'm giving it a chance. I hope you like it! 🖤

Your POV
Pain was the first thing you registered.
Pain- and a slow, annoying sound you instinctively knew was a heart monitor.
Then a dull, cloudy headache.... you furrowed your brow, trying to figure out what was going on.
Without understanding precisely why, you rationalised that you were laying in a hospital bed, hooked up to an iv.
There was a gentle pressure on your left hand, comforting in a strange way.
Gradually, you felt that someone was staring at you- the same someone cradling your limp hand?
The pain was still your focus- trying to figure out why your entire body ached and throbbed, especially your chest and head- but panic and embarrassment were starting to rival even the pain.
If someone was sitting beside you, holding your hand, he or she must know you- and with a sinking feeling, you admitted that besides waking up, your mind was blank.
You couldn't remember anything.
Pushing down your frenzied emotions with an effort, you steeled yourself and opened your eyes.
And met the anguished gaze of a very attractive man leaning over your clasped hands.
"Son of a bitch!" His voice was deep and raspy, but somehow it gave you the impression that he was fighting tears.
You smiled as convincingly as you could, given the terror, pain and emptiness battling within your head. The poor man looked so worried- which suited him, oddly enough.
"I'm sorry Jaidyn, I'm just- you had me freakin' worried for awhile there." He swallowed hard, closing his brilliantly green eyes and taking a shuddering breath.
"I'm- I'm so happy you're- you're ok, now."
The raw emotion he was feeling was splattered all over his face, and you desperately wished you had even a clue who he was.
Jaidyn- that must be your name. At least you knew that now.
"Jaidyn- is- is something wrong?" The near panic in his words warmed your heart and  broke it a little more at the same time.
"Jaidyn- talk to me." There was an endearing combination of pleading, fear and command in his expression now.
You took a deep breath and frowned, letting the weak smile go completely.
There was something undeniably familiar about that deep voice, those beautiful green eyes-
"I'm sorry- I don't know how to say this...." you trailed off, realizing with a pang that you didn't know his name. Couldn't remember it, at least.
"But?" He whispered huskily.
" I don't- I don't know - you. I don't know- I can't remember- anything."
You were surprised by how much the hurt on his face pained you, since you didn't have the slightest idea who he was.
A darkness that looked like agony and something else flashed across his handsome face, but was quickly masked.
He cleared his throat, awkwardly removing his hands from where they still clung to yours.
It almost felt like something small and cold rubbed across your left hand, but the sudden absence of his hands warmth was more disturbing.
"I'm sorry, b- Jay! Jaidyn. I'm uh, I'm- I'm Dean. I'm your- we were- we're, uh, we're friends."
He smiled, but there was heartache behind his eyes.
Dean fit him, you thought to yourself.
Trying not to be obvious, you dared to give him a once over- tall, you could tell even as he sat there, with brown hair in a decidedly attractive cut, a masculine jaw and those almost mesmerising green eyes.
He was tucking something securely into a pocket on his jacket- a leather jacket to complete the rugged, tough guy look that suited him so well- so you let yourself admire him for a moment.
There was a short silence as he studied the floor and you gathered your thoughts, a little flustered by your unexpectedly hot companion.
Well, no use putting off the inevitable.
"So.... Dean?"
He whipped his head up to meet your inquisitive gaze. "D'you want to tell me- what happened?"
You looked down at the heavy bandages covering most of your body.
Your mind still felt fuzzy and blank, and try as you might there was just - nothing there.
The man, who was probably around thirty, cleared his throat again, then nodded slowly.
"Right.
Uhm, do- d'you remember- remember- hunting?"
Something about the word was very familiar, but you shook your head.
"Sorry, I don't think I do."
"It's not your fault."
The muscle in his jaw was twitching furiously as he met your gaze.
Anger, resentment maybe, blazed in those green eyes before he dropped them to the carpet again, one hand absentmindedly going into the jacket pocket.
"We uhm, we hunt together.
A lot.
We were hunting the day before yesterday, and uhm... to make a long story short, I was an idiot, but you're the one laying in a hospital bed paying for it."
Dean swallowed hard, his eyes shining suspiciously.
"It's uhm, it's all- it's all my fault Jaidyn."
The utter self loathing in his tone worried you. This man obviously cared about you very much, and if you weren't stupid - please don't be stupid, me! You silently cried- the feeling would've been mutual.
You wracked your brain for anything to change the heartbreak in his eyes to a smile.
Just then, the door flew open and a younger, very tall man with beautiful brown hair burst in, breaking the intense silence.
In just a few steps he was dropping  to his knees beside your bed and carefully grabbed your hands, talking the whole time.
"Jay- you're awake!
I've been so freakin' worried, I wasn't sure- I wasn't sure what would happen for a while there, and that scared the hell out of me.
And Dean- Dean honestly hasn't slept in two days. Like brother like brother I guess.
He's been moaning and crying, though- never thought I'd see Dean Winchester crying in public!"
You stared down at his huge hand cradling your small, pale ones. Somehow this giant puppy- man made your heart lighter, and this was without knowing a single thing about him.
If only you could remember him.... if only you could remember anything!
"Sammy-" Deans low, pained murmur was cut off.
"Apparently, hunters make paranoid boyfriends!!
Who'd have guessed, right??
I mean, dangers part of the gig everyday so you'd think, I dunno, we'd get used to it!"
You looked up to his hazel eyes, so big and excited.
Only one sentence had fully registered.
"You're my- boyfriend?"
Sams smile froze, and you wondered if you had said something wrong.
The chair Dean has been sitting in hit the wall with a jarring crash as he madly dashed out of the room.
Even above the din of breaking wood, you could make out a choked, painful sound that made your heart ache.
Was Dean- crying?
"What's going on, Jay?
This is - this is a joke, right? You're starting another prank war?"
You could only stare at the open door in shock.
"Jay! Don't you- don't you remember me- remember us?"
You blinked hard, wondering why it felt so empty and flat now that Dean was gone.
Sam's voice was on the verge of panic now.
"Jay- talk to me!!!"
"I- I don't know you.
I'm so sorry- I don't even know what's going on. I'm really sorry, you seem amazing and- I just, I wish I could remember.
I woke up, and Dean was sitting here- I didn't know who he was. He told me we were friends, that I was hunting with him?
But I can't remember anything. I wish I could. My mind is just- blank."
Sam stared down at you, his face tensing.
"Jay- I'm so sorry! I had no idea-" he trailed off miserably.
"Tell me, please. Tell me who you are, tell me about Jay- I didn't even remember my own name. Dean had to tell me."
Sam took a deep, shaky breath.
"I'm your best friend- well, you're my best friend, besides Dean."
He chuckled softly.
You felt a thrill of joy that these amazing men actually cared about you, quickly marred by the memory of Deans pain and hasty exit.
"We've- we've known each other since we were kids, lost contact when I went to college but reconnected a couple years ago when you saved our asses during a hunt gone wrong.
Caught up over dinner afterwards and-" he shrugged.
"The rest is history. We've been traveling and hunting together ever since.
And boy, we make a hella good team."
He paused to give you another sad smile, the one that made you feel like he really, really cared.
"I guess you want to know- about the uhm, the accident?"
You nodded dutifully.
A few minutes ago that was all you'd wanted, to relearn who you were, but now you would much rather have Dean come back.
However, Sammy was your boyfriend, wasn't he?
He had said so, you were pretty sure.
In any case, you didn't want to hurt his feelings.
"So get this."
A shock went through you at the words, and you felt as though you had heard them many times before.
Unaware of your excitement, Sam rushed on.
"We were uhm, taking a break. In an old cabin near where we were- hunting.
There was a lot going on, we were all tired and- anyways, you were the only one smart enough to realize the wi- to realize the house was- was.. caving in. You were already outside.  I got out when you yelled, but Dean- Dean wasn't fast enough.
So you ran back and shoved him out, just as it collapsed. You were crushed pretty bad- we weren't sure you were gonna make it."
He swallowed hard.
"Dean- why was he so upset?"
You felt a strange urgency to hear his answer.
"Well, y'know Dean-"
He paused abruptly, flushing.
"Sorry Jay. I keep forgetting.
Dean- Dean uh, he blames himself- for everything. That's just- that's who he is.
He thinks it's his fault, says it should've been him that was nearly- nearly killed."
He finished in a whisper.
It made sense, and went along with your observations of the older brother, but there had to be something more.
On a sudden hunch, you began hesitantly, "Sammy?"
A flicker of amusement lit his face again.
"Technically, Jay, Dean's the only one allowed to call me that. But I'll give you an exception because you're sick."
Smiling a little despite the circumstances, you continued, "Just now, you said we're best friends.
But earlier, you- I thought- maybe I imagined it, I'm sorry."
Sam leaned forwards, his face gentle and concerned.
"Is this about- when uhm, I said something about hunters making terrible boyfriends?"
"It was paranoid, but-" you nodded shyly.
"No, Jay, you are my best friend in the world. But- I'm not sure how to say this. I love you like crazy, but- we're like brother and sister."
You tried to stifle a sigh of relief.
Sam seemed like a genuinely amazing guy, but something just didn't feel right.
He cleared his throat again, looking sad.
" I'm not sure I should tell you- y'know, not sure how much you should take in all at once."
"I can take it, Sam.
But if I go into cardiac arrest, just tell the doctors it's your fault."
He met your gaze with an intensely pleasing smile.
"There's the Jay I love! Threats, sarcasm-" he shook his head, sending his gorgeous hair flying.
"What- what does Dean m- who is he - to Jay? To me?"
Dead serious, Sam swallowed hard.
"Jay, Dean is your boyfriend- but he's been waiting for the perfect opportunity to propose to you.
After - after the accident, he put the ring on you and said if you'd accept him your wedding could be as soon as you woke up.
You said, and I quote, I'll marry you in a freakin' hospital bed if I have to, Dean Winchester.
That was - was right before you passed out."
Sam shook his head again.
"It was the only thing that kept him going when - we thought we might - uhm, thought we might lose you.
He almost gave up- but I promised him it would be ok.
I guess he just - just couldn't stay strong when uh, when you didn't know him."
"Dean- Dean proposed to me?
We're- we're en- we're engaged?"
The headache returned in dizzying force, and it was nearly impossible to get a breath.
You barely had time to mutter, "I'm suing you for giving me a heart attack, Sam Winchester," before the room went black.