Fatal Attraction 3: La Impostora

Chapter 36

"Kinaya mo nga akong hindi kausapin nang halos isang taon!"

"I hurt you because of that." His thumb traced over her cheek. "I'm sorry."

"But don't you ever think that I don't love you anymore. Malaki ang naging tampo ko sa 'yo nang iwan mo ako. I honestly couldn't fathom why you need to give up on me. I felt devastated! I was fucked up. I woke up every morning hoping that that was just a nightmare just like as I thought you  were dead. Na sana nandoon pa rin kayo, gigisingin ako ng mga halik niyo. Walang araw na hindi ko hiniling na sana bumalik na kayo pero hindi nangyari.  Mas lalong sumama ang loob ko dahil kaya mo pala akong tiisin ng ganoon katagal. Naisip ko, na baka kaya gan'on dahil hindi mo ako mahal. It's just easy for you to give up on me and live that long without me kasi ako lang talaga ang nagmamahal sa atin.

"I woke up everyday feel nothing but pain and resentment. But deep within I know that I still love you dahil hindi ako masasaktan ng ga'on kung hindi. I'm just trying to hide it because it's more painful to think that I am completely and utterly head over heels in love with you, while you on the other hand, isn't love me that much. Masaya ka na kasama lang ang pamilya di baleng hindi ako. Habang ako, kahit na maayos na ang pamilya ko, durog na durog parin dahil sainyo ni Ryke."

"It isn't true, Wilson!" Sasahh tried to vindicate herself but Wilson divulged.

"Totoo 'yon, Sasahh! I saw how happy you were while you were in New York. I was there, I witnessed with my own eyes."

"What do you mean?" Her eyebrows pinched together in wonderment.

"Sa 5th birthday party ni Ryke. Nandoon kami ni Alford. We were just hiding inside those mascots' uniforms." He heard her sharp intake of breath, surprised at his divulgence. Nagpunta sila ni Alford na suot ang Elmo and Cookie Monster. An acquaintance from that country helped them to effectuate their plan. Ito ang nakipag-usap habang nakatago sila sa mascot. Sinabi nilang regalo iyon mula sa Pilipinas para kay Ryke. Mula sa kanya.

"Mukhang mas gusto mo si Elmo at panay ang yakap mo sa kanya kaya nakipagpalit ako kay Alford. Nagpakita rin ako Ryke. Thank, God, our son knows how to keep a secret kapag napapakiusapan."

"No! Ryke kept on telling us that Elmo is his dad. Iyon pala ang ibig niyang sabihin." Lumamlam ang mga mata ni Sasahh at muli ay napuno iyon ng luha.

"Kahit kailan hindi nawala o nabawasan man lang ang pagmamahal ko sa 'yo. Pero kinailangan ko lang sikilin. Kinailangan ko lang mas mahalin ang sarili ko. Kasi natatakot ako... natatakot akong baka iwan mo na naman ako."

He  caresses her face with extra gentleness as if it was the most expensive and delicate gemstone in the world while his eyes bored into her wide hazel-eyes.

"How many times did I ask you to escape with me? Thrice? Four times. But you just laughed at me. Hindi mo ako sineseryoso."

The first time he asked Sasahh to escape with him is when they just started seeing each other but he was rejected. After a month of dating, and get intimate to each other. He fell in love with her to the point he's willing to ran away from his all responsibilities.

After a year she left for New York nagkita ulit sila ni Sasahh nang magpunta siya ng New York. He'd realized that his feeling for Sasahh would never fade away. It's still deep and strong. He asked her again, and for the second time he was turned down. Alam niyang may pagtingin din naman sa kanya si Sasahh pero hindi lang nito kayang i-give up ang pangarap at ayaw sawayin ang ama. Pangatlong alok niya rito ay nang maaksidente na nga ito. He has a perfect plan that time. Hindi nila kailangan ni Sasahh na isakripisyo ang sariling pamilya dahil si Samantha mismo ang lalayo pero hindi nangyari dahil sa aksidente na lalong pinalala ang sitwasyon. At ang huli ang pinakamasakit. Akala niya okay na ang lahat. Umasa siya pero sa bandang huli ay maiiwan pala siya sa ere. Inirespeto naman niya iyon, pero nasaktan parin siya sa naging desisyon ni Sasahh at nagalit sa ginawang iyon ni Tyler. He knew it was selfish to feel resentment dahil alam naman niya ang pinagdaan ng magkakapatid but couldn't dismiss that emotion.