A/N : To whomever is reading this message, tysm for over 300 views on my story! thats so exhilarating for me to see and you have no idea how much that means the world to me since the last time I checked my viewer-count, I only had around one-hundred n' something & i am so sorry abt my lack of posting chapters. I've been quite busy recently and I really can't wait to continue writing about my fave girls and I'm glad to be seeing all of your support for those past days I've been gone. I love and appreciate you, take care! <3
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Library . . .
Therese absolutely adored going to the library. The smell of old books, the quiet calmness, the dim lighting; it made her feel safe and protected in a different way from the red dimness of her darkroom on Madison Avenue. As comforting as her workspace was, she sometimes missed the quiet company that Carol provided. The space was much too small for more than one person; and the one time that she managed to convince Carol to join her in the photo developing process, she had ended up getting fixer all over her skirt because Carol just couldn't keep her hands to herself.
As Therese gathered her belongings into a beautiful leather satchel Carol had bought her for her birthday, she heard Carol rifling through the kitchen cabinets and grumbling to herself. She caught a word or two from the living room, something about "that damn mug" and "I'm not old enough to be so damn forgetful". Therese smiled to herself and picked up the turquoise mug half-filled with day old coffee from the side table.
"Therese, have you seen my - " Carol stopped short as she rounded the corner and saw that damn mug wrapped in Therese's hands. "You're a star, you know that?" Her eyes shifted to the leather bag slung over her shoulder. "Where are you headed off to?" She asked, gesturing to Therese's attire.
"I'm going to the library." Therese moved toward Carol to kiss her softly and hand her the mug. "Dannie told me there's a book of photographs by Berenice Abbott that he thinks I should check out."
"Oh." Carol's mouth turned down ever so slightly into a frown. She reached out to stroke Therese's cheek and tuck an errant strand of hair behind her ear. "I was hoping you would like to spend the afternoon with me here at the house."
Therese's heart clenched at Carol's disheartened tone. It was in these moments where Carol showed how vulnerable she truly is that made Therese want to wrap her in her arms and make her feel safe and loved and wanted. She leaned into Carol's touch and turned her head to kiss the inside of her palm. "Come with me, then. I want to share my favourite spot with you."
Carol beamed at the suggestion. "That sounds wonderful." She slowly leaned forward to place a kiss to the tip of Therese's nose. "But let me have my morning coffee first." She glanced at the inside mug and grimaced at the sight of day-old coffee. "Here I am, always telling Rindy to put her dishes in the sink, and I can't even do it myself."
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"You know, when I was a young girl, I always imagined what it would be like to kiss someone in the library," Carol whispered nonchalantly as she thumbed through a catalogue featuring antique furniture sets.
"Carol!" Therese's face grew hot and she smacked her lover's arm. They had been in the library for a little over an hour, and somehow Carol had become increasingly salacious with each passing moment. About ten minutes ago, she had pressed herself flush against Therese's back with the excuse of "returning a book to its proper place" on a shelf above her head.
"What?" Carol's expression was impassive, except for the glint of mischief in her eye and the slight quirk of her brow. "Are you telling me that all those days you spent in your boarding school library as a young girl, you never once thought about being pushed against the stacks and-" Carol looked up from her magazine to find that Therese was no longer standing beside her, but was half way across the aisle, walking briskly toward the back of the library.
Puzzled, she gingerly placed the magazine back on the shelf and followed the younger woman to the far back corner of the library. Therese abruptly turned into a different aisle and Carol, right behind her, found that she had been led to a rather isolated portion of the building.
"This is my favourite spot in the whole library," Therese spoke softly, avoiding eye contact with Carol. Instead, she focused on delicately caressing the spines of old encyclopedias and tattered, out of print novels. "There's something about this... solitude that I find very comforting. You know, I'm very content with being on my own, but I do get lonely sometimes." Therese tilted an old book of poems off the shelf and into her hands. "I remember this one day... I was about nine. I was sitting in the library and my mother had just visited me the night before-"
"Therese, sweetheart, you don't have to tell me anything." Carol knew that Therese hated talking about her mother, it was evident in the way her brow would knit together and her mouth would twist into a deep frown.
But Therese shook her head and continued, "I was sitting in the library and I heard these two people giggling. I was curious as to what they found so funny, and I decided to follow the sound of laughter. When I rounded a corner, I found this couple kissing. I was shocked to see something so... inappropriate in a library, but I couldn't stop watching. I didn't know what it was that I was feeling at the time, but I understand now that it was desire. Intimacy has always been so foreign to me." Therese placed the book back on the shelf and gave her full attention to Carol. "My mother wasn't the most affectionate person, when she would hug me it felt like more of an obligation than an act of love."
"So when I saw those two people kissing I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to have someone want me. What would it be like to like someone so much that you wanted to sneak off in the middle of the library to kiss them?" Therese's eyes were glassy with tears, and Carol had the irresistible urge to reach out and intertwine their fingers. "What would it be like to stop feeling so lonely?"
"Oh, angel," Carol sighed and stepped closer to Therese. She raised her hands to Therese's shoulders and squeezed them tightly. She watched as Therese's eyes fluttered closed, and couldn't help but appreciate the girl's youthful beauty. You're too young to have felt such sadness, Carol thought as her hands glided slowly up Therese's neck to cup her face. "I think it feels like this." Carol pulled Therese toward her and kissed her softly. She smiled into the kiss when she felt Therese rock towards her ever so slightly.
Therese inhaled deeply and wrapped her arms around Carol's waist, reveling in the texture of Carol's tweed jacket beneath her hands. Their embrace lasted only a few moments longer before Therese pulled away, her cheeks rosy and her dimples visible. "I love you."
"I love you too, dearest." Carol smiled and wiped some of her lipstick from Therese's lips. "How about we find that book Dannie told you about and then we head home." She took a step back and adjusted her coat and ran a hand through her curls, returning to the elegantly poised Carol Aird. Therese nodded and grinned, so thankful for this lovely woman who seemed to know just what to say and do. It would be a long time before Therese ever felt that deep loneliness again.
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|| Just one last reminder that you are a precious, beautiful human being. And don't let anyone stop you for wanting what you want or what you want to be. You're worth a second to be heard and I know that you will pursue those dreams which will suddenly happen. have a wonderful evening, my dear lovelies!
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