safe with me. / c yelich. ✔️

64.

I nod, "Thank you, mom..."

"No need to thank me. Now, you get some rest too. You need it. It's been a long night for you as well, I'll talk to you after you get some sleep."

"I love you." I tell her, wiping under my eyes.

"I love you so much, C. Tell Nadia I love her too, and that I'll give her a call when she's ready.."

"Okay, mom. I'll talk to you later. Love you, bye.." I say before hanging up and set my phone on the table next to the bed. I look at Nadia, who hasn't moved in the last hour and just tear up again. God, I was a horrible husband.

****

When we got home, Nadia barely said a word. The car ride home was pretty quiet, only the sound of the radio playing in the background. Other than that, it wasn't really a chatty car ride. I still felt like shit; I didn't really know what to say to her, and I didn't want to say anything that could possibly upset her. I was torn, honestly. I just wanted to make sure she was okay.

Aspen was on the couch drinking coffee and watching TV when we both walked in. She got up, going to hug Nadia. Nadia just took a deep breath, hugging her back. I sighed, looking at the two,

"Thank you for staying over last night.." I tell her, noticing how Wyatt was still in bed. Hopefully he didn't wake up and notice we were gone..

Aspen nodded, "Of course, I wish I could help.." She said as she rubbed Nadia's back and Nadia went into the bedroom, closing the door behind her. "Has she really talked at all?"

I shook my head, "No...The car ride was really quiet and awkward. I didn't really know what to say to her. I didn't want to say something that could potentially upset her, y'know?" I asked, she nodded, "I feel like shit. I feel like I could've done something, you know? I feel like I could've helped her more, or something.."

"I mean, there's nothing really you can do with miscarriages...I am sure just being there for her is more meaningful than you know, C." Aspen told me, "I know you are feeling crummy, but, just being there for her probably means the world to her. She's going to be bummy the next couple of days, especially with something like this." She put her hand on my shoulder, "I am always a phone call away too if you guys need anything. I seriously have no problem coming over."

"Thank you, Aspen." I say before hugging her, "Really means a lot.." I rub her back and pull away from the hug, "I'll let you go home now, I'm gonna go check on her and see if she's okay.."

Aspen nodded, smiling, "No problem at all, seriously. Let me know if you need anything." She left a couple of minutes later and I poked my head into Wyatt's room to notice he was still sleeping before walking into my bedroom and saw that Nadia was sitting up in bed, blankets pulled over her legs but she was hugging her knees.

"Hey.." I said, sitting down by her feet, "How do you feel?"

Nadia stayed quiet for a second and then looked at me, "Do you want my honest answer?" She spoke up, and I nodded. "I feel like absolute shit. I feel like a failure." She teared up, her voice audibly sad, "I know there wasn't anything I could've done to prevent the miscarriage, but I feel like there could've been something that I could've done.." She sniffled, wiping under her eyes,

"The last thing I wanted was to lose the baby, I just wanted to be a good momma to two kids, and I can't even have that.." She said before crying again. I moved and pulled her into my lap, holding her close to me as she cried.

"Babe, you are the most amazing mother to Wyatt, don't ever doubt yourself with that, okay? You are so strong, so brave, so caring, and yeah this is a setback, and it hurts the both of us, but, maybe right now wasn't the time to have a baby.." I say, frowning, "I have been feeling horrible because I don't know really what to do or say to help you.." I sigh,

"I feel like there could've been something I could've done beforehand. But, there wasn't...And that's what's eating me alive."

Nadia sniffled, looking up at me, "You being here has helped a lot, seriously.." She wiped under my eyes, "There wasn't anything you or I could've done, it just happened.." She told me as I nodded, rubbing her back. "It's going to take me a while to process everything and I might not be cheery and happy the next couple of days, but, I am going to be okay.."

I kiss her head, softly. "I love you very much, Nads.."

"And I love you...Thank you, baby.."

I nod, rubbing her side, "You should try and get some rest.."

Nadia looked up at me, "Have you slept at all?" I shook my head, answering her question, "Why don't you try sleeping? You need rest too, babe.." She said and I just shrugged, "Baby, you need to rest..."

"I know, just haven't been sleeping. I would rather make sure you're okay.." I sighed, laying my head down, "You're my top priority."

"Okay, and you're mine. I want you to rest..." She told me and put her hand on my cheek, "I don't want you being overworked or overtired..."

"I'm gonna be fine, I want you to sleep." I told her, pulling the blanket up. "Maybe I'll fall asleep.."

She just sighed and nodded, "Okay...Wake me up if you need anything.."

"I'll be fine, beautiful," I say before kissing her lips gently. "I love you,"

"I love you too, so much..." She said as she kissed me again and cuddled against my chest before she eventually fell asleep again.

She needed the rest, I didn't.