Aeipathy [Yoonmin]

38.

The fear of people knowing about him was too strong and powerful. It consumed him in a sea of selfishness that he couldn't get out of. No matter how much he loved, Jimin.

Jimin walked up to Yoongi and the group of friends suddenly went quiet. Yoongi started breathing heavily as he slowly looked up to see his face. When he did Jimin shoved the folded paper to him. 

"Go fuck yourself, Min Yoongi."

Jungkook's mouth dropped open and they all looked at him shocked. Yoongi's cigarette fell from between his lips. He held the paper which none of them had noticed.

Then, Jimin walked away leaving everyone else confused. "Holy shit, he told you to fuck your self." Jin said.

"Yeah, he heard that. Can't you see he's in shock?" Hoseok added.

"Why did he say that?" Namjoon wondered.

"I'm so shook. Holy fuck." Jungkook said dumbfounded.

"What did you do to him?" Taehyung asked slightly aggravated. He knew that Jimin wouldn't say something like that without a reason.

Yoongi couldn't function at the moment. It was like he froze in time. "What did you do to him?" He repeated this time pulling his arm to snap him back to reality.

"Nothing." He whispered.

"You obviously did something to him. He wouldn't say that for nothing." He spoke following Jimin behind.

"Hey? Where are you going?" Jungkook asked, but didn't get an answer.

"Jimin! Wait, wait for me." Taehyung said running behind him. Jimin still had the lump in his throat and could feel his heart sinking by the second. 

"Are you okay?"

"I'm okay. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to walk away like that."

"What did he do to you?" He asked.

"Uhh," he took a deep shaky breath. His mouth started to water and he knew he would start crying if he kept talking so he took a few seconds to reply.

"Nothing. It just hurt my feelings that he didn't acknowledge my presence. I-I thought we were friends." He said looking down at his shoes. His chin was quivering and his eyesight blurry.

"Yoongi is complicated. He's nice, but sometimes he gets in his moods and no one knows why."

Jimin nodded wiping his tears with the back of his hand. Taehyung sighed and grabbed his chin making him look up.

"He really hurt your feelings didn't he?"

He nodded again and Taehyung pulled him in for a sweet hug. "I'm here. Don't worry. I would never ignore you."

•••

Yoongi walked in the room as Jimin was ready to head out. He had agreed to run with Taehyung for distraction after his mental breakdown earlier.

They caught eyes for a split second until Jimin walked by without saying a word. "Where are you going?" Yoongi asked. 

Jimin ignored him and kept walking. He could feel his heart in his throat and his stomach uneasy.

"Hey, where are you going? Are you just gonna ignore me?"

Jimin turned around angry his face turning bright red. "Don't be such a jerk." He told. Yoongi shrugged, "What? I'm asking you question."

"You ignored me."

"What was I suppose to do? Greet you with a kiss and a hug?" He replied sarcastically. Why couldn't he understand?

"It's not that. I didn't need a kiss or a hug. A simple look would've been okay. I was worried about you. You said you'd meet me and I went everyday for the past seven days to wait for you. I waited until dark and you never came. and seeing you with your friends laughing and goofing around made me realize you never wanted to show up in the first place.

Yoongi sighed and looked away to keep his cool. He was so angry at himself for hurting him, but he couldn't do it. He couldn't get past his mind or doubts.

"I was busy, okay? And my parents weren't happy about me being suspended." He lied. His parents didn't care. They didn't even try to contact him or asked where he was staying.

Jimin didn't say a word. The look in his eyes told him everything making him feel guiltier. "I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I'm already hurt. You don't need to take credit for that. I'm just disappointed." He said with us eyes floodgates with tears.

He walked out and Yoongi didn't try to stop him. That's what hurt him the most. Yoongi wanted to chase him. He really did, however it felt like his feet were too heavy to do so.

Instead, he walked over and laid on his bed staring at Jimin's empty bed. The folded paper he had given him was still in his pocket.

He couldn't read it. At least not now when his heart was so troubled. He wished he could turn off his brain for a while. And just lay in bed without thinking too much.

So, he stared at the bed for what seemed forever. Torturing himself with the what if's.
Waiting for Jimin to give up on him.

It was almost like holding your breath underwater waiting to run out of oxygen. He could feel him slip away.

It was only a matter of time.