𝒖𝒏𝒓𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 • 𝙩𝙬𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙩 • ✓

{13th of July - b.y}

"so... i found out i was gay when i developed a major crush on one of my orchestra mates back in high school. his name was lucas. when i hadn't met him i was a shyer, more insecure person that doubted myself a lot. because of this, i was picked on most of the time, but lucas came to me and protected me. he supported me all the way through and we gradually became close friends, in and out of the orchestra."

eddy stopped and his lips form a small little smile.

"well, not anymore. he developed a feeling for me overtime and we became a couple. we had a similar passion for music and strived to be better for each other. we were inseparable and totally in love with each other. it was just pure love back in the days and those days were gone."

his short-lived smile left his face and was replaced with a more melancholic look.

"he gave up his dream as a musician." eddy sighed as he picked up a photo from his locker. "he gave up his passion for his hobby, which was sports. don't get me wrong, i supported him in whatever he did, just that, the support was one-sided. he stopped caring about what i did on the music side of things. to me, he was a total change of personas."

eddy gave another laugh, one that sounded very sarcastic.

"here is a thing that made me livid about: ever since he stepped out of music, he has been mocking non-stop about musicians (shocked face from both of us) and degrading their entire existence in society. and here's another one: a month before we broke up (a gasp from ray), he was cleaning his room and i was at the orchestra that day. he came across a composition i made for him back in the times he was still a musician where he used to love playing it all day, guess what he did? he crumpled it and placed it near the rubbish bin!"

"at least he didn't throw it in." muttered a barely audible ray.

"he didn't throw it in because it was full!" eddy threw his arms up in the air while doing an eye roll. "when i came back to find it there, i was mad at him. i stormed towards him and the two of us started bickering. i was asking him why he didn't treasure this, and he was like why would he keep it? when i heard him say that i was angry and heartbroken. i told him i composed that for him only and there's only one copy of this out there, and he tells me that i wouldn't be composing trash like this! my composition! trash!"

as eddy continued, tears started forming near the frame of his eyes. i gave a few pats on his shoulder as the tears came running down his cheeks.

"we argued. it was horrible. i remember feeling very sad and very angry, and also very guilty. i slapped him hard across the cheek for saying such things. he got very pissed and ripped the entire paper into two... my heart felt so bad..."

eddy buried his face into the sleeves of his hoodie and started bawling. all ray and i could do was comfort him the best we could do by his side as he staggers on his words, choking back tears.

"i... i apologised to him for multiple t-times... but both of us knew that our relationship was broken at that point." eddy murmurs between his cries. "we broke up after a month, through a call. i was at home at that time and he at the gym. i told him that the two of us are not meant for each other anymore and that he should find someone else. he came that night and left in complete silence. the following day, we were already strangers."

eddy wiped some of his tears.

"sometimes i still think about him, how we used to be so close to each other and treasured each other to the bottom of our hearts. but that was all in the past. i moved on after a few months, and kind of went on with my life."

his smile grew into a little frown.

"but he didn't."

"a few months after the breakup, he started texting me again, asking for an apology. he said he was very sorry and still loved me. i politely denied him, told him to move on and didn't respond to any of the messages from him afterwards and soon after he began spamming me with messages and stalking me online on my whereabouts and whatever that was going on in my life (wide eyes from both of us). he would create multiple accounts that would like my posts many times, and he also had friends who lurk somewhere near my college so that he checks an eye on me. it was unsafe everywhere. he would go to any concert or show that had the orchestra that i attended to or participated in just so he could watch me. there was a time where when i came back home from a late Christmas banquet at the college where i found him fast asleep on my doorstep with a present! (gasp from both me and ray) i had to enter my house from the backdoor and call the neighbourhood security to drag him out. these stalking moments gave me anxiety attacks at night sometimes and i wouldn't sleep well for weeks."

eddy sighed and messed up his hair. the two of us looked at each other, and we could probably already make out what had happened a few minutes ago.

"yeah... the person that confronted me just now was lucas. i didn't know he came to this university, didn't know he was willing to pick up music again, his now most detested subject, just to meet me and ask me to be his again. but i know he doesn't truly love music. he'll probably drop out of the university once i'm his again or something... he can't understand how i feel towards music. music was that one thing i grew up with, the only memory of my father, the only thing that kept me safe and secure at night because i uphold the thought of being with my family whenever the sound of violin rings through my ears even if the house is empty, quiet and lonely... i thought he used to know. i don't know what happened to him..."

eddy stared at the ground, looking lost and confused.

"what happened to your father?"

eddy gave a shallow smile.

"my father was a solo violinist. he always dazzled me with his skills. i wanted to be just like him when i was younger... sadly he passed away midway through performance because of a heart attack. his heart wasn't always that well yet he still went for the show that night. he lived as a violinist, and died as a violinist."

"oh, sorry to hear that. it must've been hard for you."

eddy just casually shrugged and waved it off, a happier smile creeping back onto his face once he heard ray's once-in-forever solemn tone.

"it's alright. it's the past, i don't mind about it. anyways, i'm glad you guys listened to what i shared, it lifted much of the burden. also, i wasted much of your lunch hour, that's not good."

"nah, it's fine eddy!" ray exclaims, a wide grin forming on his face as well as he hung an arm across eddy's shoulder, the two of them chuckling. "we're friends that's what matters."

i smiled at the two. i was glad to have them in my life.

"we should go to lunch!" ray cheerfully stated as he dragged a laughing eddy towards the door, leaving his violin on the ground and without waiting for me. i gaped at the two in shock.

"h-hey, wait up!" i called. they ignored me.

huffing, i turned to pick up his violin, grumbling in annoyance, unbeknownst to myself that i missed a short question that ray had whispered into eddy's ear which made his ears turn a shade of red, and made ray snicker and tease him the whole day long.

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a.n: omg i'm so sorry guys this is so LONG!!!! adjihfwnw

*BACKSTORY MARATHON ON THIS ONE LMAO*

but i still hope you guys enjoyed it >.< cause i did enjoy writing it

AND SOFT EDDY IS TO DIE FOR-

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