Sighing, he went in search of his wife. She wasn't in the family room, so he headed upstairs and found her curled up on the bed. At first he thought she was asleep until he heard a sob. Frowning, he thought about how much he hated her job. If he had his way, she would quit and not because he didn't value her, but the opposite. She spared him the details, but she dealt with heart wrenching business every day. Remembering again the day they met, the people she helped every day, had problems far more extreme than a homesick freshman.

"Chell." He whispered.

She abruptly sat up, as if surprised to see him home. Was she crying because of him? She often let the doubt creep in when he worked long hours. She read too many books, and he found it hard to reassure her that not every husband who worked late was dicking around. Lord, he had plenty of chances if he wanted to, but he had absolutely no interest. He didn't have time for his wife why the hell would he want to add on another woman. Shaking his head, he remembered the conference. There was an organizer who all but said he was welcome to visit her room anytime. He left early because as she fawned over him he felt a twitch. He'd rather be home with his wife even though the years had taken away an instantaneous response to every touch. Really it wasn't a bad thing, because how the hell could they raise their kids if he got a boner every time she smiled. Lord, a smile was all it took when he first met her. It took him a half hour to walk across the room to speak to her at the party, because just seeing her had made him hard.

Watching her distraught, he only felt love as he sat beside her on the edge of the bed. "What's wrong?"

She wiped her eyes. "Christmas."

"Christmas?" Ot was the last thing he expected her to say.

"Lily called to tell me she'll be working over Christmas and won't be coming home. She found a classmate to stay with in Bridgton. So I called Robbie, and he told me he's spending Christmas with Cayla's family."

Cayla was their son's girlfriend, and they were rather serious for twenty-two years old. Who was he to judge seeing as he was in love with Chellie at the same age?

"So neither of them?" He also felt depressed by the news.

"I know it isn't like when they were little, but to not have either of them."

"I was looking forward to having the four of us together again like when Robbie came to Maine for the weekend in July. Come here."

She moved into his embrace and he held her. Her scent wafted into his nose and he kissed the top of her head. He remembered her crying when the children were very young. It upset her, because she had thought as their mother all she would have to do was hold them and they would feel better, but it wasn't always the case. He felt the same way now. He wanted to hold her and have her automatically feel better again.

He felt her calming. "Do you want me to take you out to dinner or should we order in?"

"I'm not hungry. Would you be okay with just a sandwich or something easy?"

"I think I might have lost a bit of my appetite too."

Chellie took that whole empty nest thing hard. First, Robbie went off to Nashville and then Lily left home. As much as he hated her job without it she wouldn't have survived the first year after Lily left. She probably hated his job as much as he hated hers, because he worked too damn much. Occasionally he'd run the numbers when he couldn't sleep trying to calculate how young he could retire. At forty-eight, he was a long way from an early retirement. He could move to a smaller company, but it would be a step down and his ego hadn't quite embraced a blow like that. His self worth had been wrapped up in his career for far too long. Chellie's was most likely defined by her role of wife and mother and since he had deserted her almost as much as the kids, she had thrown everything into the people she cared for at work.

She followed him downstairs and even with her red-rimmed eyes she looked beautiful. Later he would pull her in his arms and tell her how much he loved her and make passionate love to her like they used to. He felt himself getting stiff at the thought. Their dinner of turkey sandwiches and canned soup was quiet with each too absorbed in their disappointment.

He finally broke the silence. "Should we get the tree this weekend?"

She took a moment before responding. "Let's wait until next week. I don't need the constant reminder of how disappointing Christmas will be. It's not like Thanksgiving."

Neither kid came for Thanksgiving, but they went to his sister's house and there was a big crowd. Being one of four and each with grown kids, the family was constantly growing. There were spouses and children for many of his nieces and nephews. The family Christmas celebration was always the Sunday before Christmas, so on Christmas they spent a day with immediate family or in-laws. He had no in-laws, because Chellie was an only child and both her parents had passed a long time ago. She lost her mother from lung cancer the year after Lily was born and then her father of a heart attack about ten years later. She inherited the family cottage on The Point in Maine. It was their special retreat. They loved the time they spent at the beach each summer.

He smiled, and she looked at him. "What?"

He thought about his responsibilities at work. If he worked extra hard, he could probably manage it. She frowned, because he was deep in thought and ignoring her, but he smiled again.

"Don't you have time you have to take or you'll lose at the end of the year?"

They didn't have use or lose benefits at his company. It was anti motivating, but she worked for the state.

She answered tentatively. "Yes, but if you're thinking about Christmas in the sun on a beach, I'm not interested."

"Christmas has to be cold and preferably with snow... the first and last snow of the season."

She snorted, because living in New England they both knew his statement was ridiculous.

"I was thinking beach though. Let's go to the cottage for Christmas. We could see Lily on her days off and we wouldn't be in this house alone without the kids, because frankly it's too depressing."

"We've never stayed in the winter before."

"It's winterized. We've used the heat before. It worked that cold weekend in September when we went to close up for the season."

"What about your work?" She sounded skeptical.

"I think I can get everything done a week early. I never work between Christmas and New Year. I can't guarantee I won't touch my laptop, but..."

"I don't believe you."

He really didn't blame her, because he made promises before which he couldn't keep. "I can only promise to do my best. We could leave the day after the family party. I really don't want to miss it. Do you think Lily might make it?"

"I doubt it but maybe. She might come to the cottage though, even if just to hang out with Lilli. If we decide to doing this, I'll call Lana about opening up the cottage. We just paid the plumber for shutting off the water."

"I know but it will cost a lot less than a week on a tropical beach. We'll have a beach it will be the opposite of tropical. Aren't there holiday events we've never been to?"

"I know the Evans' have an open house on Christmas Eve, but I'm not sure what else."

"We can find things to do. We can get a tree there."

"You really want to do this, don't you?"

"Yeah, I do. We need it. Spending Christmas alone in this house will kill us both."

She paused. "Okay, if we can get the time off, let's do it."

"No, let's do it even if it's just for Christmas week."

She smiled, and it reminded him of how much he loved her. Hoping to relax, he took a shower and when he came out of the bathroom, Chellie was sound asleep. Maybe they would both stay awake long enough to make long passionate love in Maine.

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