Life and Love

First Kiss

"Wake up!" I feel a tugging sensation on my arm and groan in annoyance. "I said wake up!" I am pulled from the couch and hit the floor hard. As I blink through tired eyes, I see Becca standing over me with her hands on her hips. "If you are going to pretend to sleep, then just leave." She scoffs at me and stomps away through the mass of balloons covering the living room floor.

We are all hanging out at Becca's neighbor's house for her birthday party and I must have dozed off. I look up and see Nik staring down at me from the couch, a vacant spot next to him. The feeling of his arm around my shoulders comes back to me, and now I know the real reason I upset Becca. Irritated, I stomp out of the house and slam the door behind me. I know Becca's sister Sarah is at home, so I walk the few steps over to their house and let myself inside.

"Why did you leave the party?" Sarah asks from her usual spot in front of the computer.

"Because your sister is a jealous bitch." I spit out and flop onto the chaise lounge.

"Nik?" Sarah questions, and I nod in response.

I hear the front door open and close and brace myself for Becca to round the corner yelling at me. But it's not Becca, it's Nik and I breathe a sigh of relief.

"Sarah, your sister is losing her shit over there." Nik's voice cracks on the word 'shit' and I attempt to stifle my laughter. I've noticed this happen more frequently the last couple months, his voice is getting deeper and the sound of it warms me.

"What else is new? You two can hang out here. I don't care."

Nik crosses the living room and settles beside me in the chaise lounge, tossing his arm around my shoulders again. I grin smugly, hoping that Becca comes home and sees that she has done nothing except piss both of us off and given us time alone. Well, more alone than we had been.

We watch TV for a while, and I nuzzle closer into Nik's side, his grip tightening on my shoulder. I enjoy the feeling of his fingers drawing patterns on my shoulder and a small smile works its way onto my lips. For a few days now, I have been thinking about giving Nik a real chance and asking him to be my boyfriend. I'm just not sure yet but as we sit together now, with Sarah's back to us, I know there is something I want to try. Nik has never kissed a girl before, and I want to be that girl.

"Nik," I whisper, and turn my gaze up to his. "I want to kiss you so bad right now."

I watch his brown eyes go wide and feel his heart begin to race under his skin. When he doesn't immediately lower his face to mine, I turn my attention back to the TV, but it doesn't take long before a trembling finger comes to my chin. He gently turns my face back to his. We stare at each other for a moment and then he lowers his lips to me.

He is so gentle. I want to push my lips into his, deepening the kiss, but there is something about his racing heart and trembling hands that stops me. He just seems so innocent.

When our lips part I offer him a small smile and refocus on the show that I truly don't care about. A few minutes later, Nik's finger returns to my chin, guiding my face back to his. With each kiss he grows more confident, his lips working against mine until we are full on making out. This isn't new to me but it feels new here with Nik. I can barely comprehend the sensations pulsing through my body as our tongues move together.

I still don't know if I want to be with Nik; sometimes it's more fun to play games with him. What I know is no matter what happens, I will never forget this first kiss with Nik.