Rise Up (Jonathan Toews)

25| Less of the Same

Ariana

After what feels like forever I finally get to try and get back to what a normal life would be like. At least what I imagine a normal life would be like. Now I got a boyfriend running around the continent and all these doctors appointments so normal is not exactly where I'm going to be. But this is a lot closer than being in that damn hospital bed again.

I return to work for the first time since my accident and I have to admit, I missed my little gym. Me being physically fit is something I feel passionate about and now I get to work on that along with helping other people do it too. I say hi to my friends who worked here and they give me chocolates and flowers for finally coming back. I put them in my office but I was still here to work so I head into the gym.

Being a personal trainer is cool because you meet these people with cool stories and you help them get better and feel better about themselves. You learn about their families and what they like to do. I always wanted to help people feel better about themselves, meet goals and feel beautiful inside and out. And this is how I get to do it.

"Good to see you back" my good friend Fran says.

"Thanks Frannie. Good to be back" I admit.

"You got classes today" she wonders.

"I'm easing back into it so I have a yoga class and a intermediate class. Well see how long it'll be before I get into running and high intensity workouts" I assure her.

"I hope it's soon because I struggle teaching those classes. I feel like I'm dying when I'm doing them" she claims making me laugh.

"I'll try to get back as soon as possible, just for you" I smirk.

"You better" she smiles back.

I get changed into my workout clothes and I look at myself in the mirror. I was so much smaller than the last time I was standing here. It was actually the day of my accident when I was here last. I had left for work that morning thinking it was just another day. Then it almost became my last day on this earth I've come to love.

"Hey, you good" Fran asks as she snaps be out of my mirror induced trans.

"Yeah, good and dandy" I assure her.

I head to the yoga room and I see some familiar faces. They all welcome me back telling me they missed me and they're happy I'm back. I assure them I'm more happy to be working with them and I was ready to go.

I do my classes and my body was a little out of it but I felt pretty good. I missed being active and I worked some muscles that haven't been worked in four months. Once I was done I go to my office and fill out some paper work. I sit there and think and I try to focus but it was hard.

I wanted so bad to move on from the accident, but I don't think it's going to be as easy as I hoped. Everyone knew what happened to me and there was reminders no matter where I looked. The way people look at me makes me feel so... sad. They give me that "I'm sorry" face and it makes me so emotional. I hated feeling like just a fraction of who I used to be. I hated that everyone knew what happened and thinks that means I should be treated differently. Then again I don't know why I thought I would walk out of that hospital and things would be the same as when I got in there. A lot of people knew about my accident, it was in the news and a lot of my friends came to see me in the hospital. It was no secret I was severely injured and that I was lucky to be alive. But all I wanted was to move on, to wherever that may be.

"Knock knock" someone says and I look up. I see Jon standing in the doorway with a bag held out in front of him. I smile big as I get up and go over to him. I pull him into a huge hug causing him to be a bit confused.

"Woah, what's going on? Is everything okay" he questions as he drops the food on my desk to hold me properly. I silently nod my head but he pulls my chin up and stares into my eyes. "Don't you lie to me" he threatens.

"I'm good, I swear. I just thought... I thought things would be different" I sigh.

"Different how" he wonders.

"People treat me differently. Like I'm lucky to be alive. And I know I am, I still don't understand why god decided to let me come back as many times as I have. But I was hoping people wouldn't be extra nice to me because of what happened. Like I'm some charity case. Today I had some lady try to give me $50 for no reason at all. It's just... disappointing, I guess" I shrug.

"I know it's hard right now. Life is still kinda new to you and it will take both you and the people around you some getting used to to have you in the real world again. But I promise they're just so happy to have you back. Before the accident you were their favorite worker here and they haven't seen you in a while. Just let them return to life as they know it and it'll get better. I promise" he claims. He places a soft kiss on my forehead and I let out a long sigh.

"Alright. You're right" I say.

"And to perk you up I brought you some lunch" he says picking up the bag again.

"Ohh food! What is it" I ask.

"A salad from Panera and a large unsweetened ice tea" he claims.

"Oh man you are so the best" I insist as I take my stuff from him. He comes in and joins me at the desk. He eats some food too as we just hang out.

Jon just got back from Arizona and was about to leave again for a while. They had one home game out of the next 9 games so that's going to suck entirely. But I'm happy Hockey is back, I've missed watching it and now I have a even better way of watching it. A better reason too. But it doesn't make missing him any easier.

"Can I ask you a question" he says.

"Sure" I shrug.

"Where are your clothes" he wonders and I laugh.

"In my bag" I say.

"Do you always work out in a sports bra" he wonders.

"Pretty much" I admit.

"And do you always look this good" he adds on.

"Usually better" I admit. I missed my muscles.

"Well now I'm feeling uneasy" he claims as he rubs his stomach and I just laugh.

"Don't worry. I'm not taking off my promise ring so most guys will get the hint. And for the ones who don't get the hint I have no problem telling them I'm in a relationship that's a forever kind of thing. Plus I feel like a lot more people know we're together than I think" I admit.

"I want the world to know that you're with me" he claims.

"Why" I question.

"Because you're actually the coolest person in the world and everyone loves you. But you love me most and I want to brag about it" he claims and I couldn't help but smile.

"I am pretty cool huh" I tease.

"Eh" he jokes and I gasp. I playfully hit his arm as he laughs at himself.

"I hate you" I accuse.

"You love me" he defends.

"More than anything" I promise.