34 - Mrs. Bananum

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Warning: abuse

After the park the losers all came to Beverly's house to get started on their plan

"So how are you planning on interrogating her? I mean I'm sure she's not gonna wanna tell us, Eddie's friends, anything" Stan says from the living room couch taking a sip of his lemonade

"Disguise" Bill responds from next to him, looking to Beverly who nods in agreement "Yeah, I was thinking I could disguise as like a middle aged lady and go to her house looking for "advice" on what to do with my kid or something"

Richie nods setting his lemonade down on the counter "Should two of us go to get the most information possible?"

"That might be a good idea" says Mike

"Well can I go with Bev then?" Richie says sending the group hopeful glances. Bev pats his back "I dunno Rich, I think she'll probably recognize you no matter how disguised you get..."

Richie looks down at the table with a sad expression "And no offense or anything but you'd probably get really angry with her and blow your cover. I mean honestly I would too, she's a bitch so how couldn't you" Mike adds, somewhat reassuringly

"I guess you're right" Richie sighs. His sad face disappears within an instant "Wait! I have an idea though, and there's two- no THREE upsides to it!" The group of teens become excited and lean in closer to Richie eager to hear

"So, now hear me out before you butt in" Richie begins "Stan AND Bill go as Bev's kid and Bev's kids boyfriend-"

"Richie hold on" Stan interrupts, blushing

Richie stands up flailing his arms "I SAID NO BUTTING IN UNTIL IM FINISHED STANELTON!"

"I know, but won't she maybe recognize us? And how would that even help"

"I WAS GETTING TO MY THREE UPSIDES, LET ME SPEAK" Richie exclaims "So as I was saying, there's three upsides! One, that's better then just one more person coming because then we have like 6 ears on deck! More people the better I think. And second, don't you think maaaaybe a gay situation right in front of her face like that would piss her off so she'd be like yes ma'am you need help real bad then she'd give you alllll the details"

Mike, Ben, and Bev nod. "Yeah sounds pretty promising actually. But what's the third reason?"

Richie smirks and folds his arms on the counter in front of him "Well my third and final reason was just so then Stan and Bill could act all gay and shit which I'm sure they'd love, so really the third reason is just a little treat for them"

Both Stan and Bill become bright red, Stan rolling his eyes while red as a tomato "I-I-I think I'm g-guh-gonna faint again" Bill says with wide eyes

Beverly bursts into laughter "This is like the hundredth time Richie has done this how are you two even still reacting!"

"Yeah seriously guys" Richie chimes in "I mean like are you dating? Fucked yet?"

Mike spews out the sip of water he took, which Richie says came out his nose. Bill gets up from the table and leaves the room to go lay on the living room couch claiming he'll faint any minute now. Stan shoots Richie a cold glare from across the table, face still bright red

"You're gonna kill him if you keep it up!" He snaps standing up from the table to go retrieve Bill

Richie and Bev continue laughing, waiting for Bill and Stan to return before they continue planning. Soon they come, Bill following close behind Stan and the two taking their seats again

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