I was completely miserable and angry as fuck. For five months I hid off the radar, only posting an ad or two when I needed the money or felt like I needed it. I was huge, our creation was sprouting and kicking, and hurting me entirely.
I was weak as hell, this was one of the hardest pregnancies I had. Saint was easy to carry, and didn't do much inside of me while she is just ready to pop. I gained almost 45 pounds in five months, which my body was drastically changing and in pain.
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Jahseh was obsessed with my stomach, thankfully. He would always rub it or talk to her, I could tell by the gleam in his eyes and his smile he was excited to be having another kid. He's helped me so damn much, rubbing my back and hips, feeding me good ass food, putting up with my pregnant emotions, taking care of Saint, and just entirely helping me through this depression I was in.
Saint was not excited, in fact he won't talk to me till she gets here, he's so damn mad. He likes the attention and I know it upsets him she's not even here but getting most of it.
My body was suffering physically, my hands changed color, and were pale. My cheeks and face were a little bit swollen, my body was completely swollen. I was aching badly in my back, hips, and anywhere else you can think of. And mentally I was suffering.
Jahseh was completely fine with it, and even helped me shave when I needed to. Or I'd go get waxed, but it was much more painful since my body was on edge. I was hairy down there and on my legs, and I was so embarrassed by it. Jahseh and I would of course have sex even though I'm pregnant and most of the time I didn't want to because I couldn't see well enough to shave, but Jahseh didn't care. He complimented me and called me beautiful everyday, it was like he knew I felt ugly.
I felt fat, stupid, useless, and just terrible overall. I just wanted this pregnancy shit to leave me alone, and I was honestly excited to meet her and see what she would look like.
I groaned as I pulled the rope above my head, lifting myself up as my swollen toes hit the ground. I walked to the bathroom, my body aching badly as I stood near the counter. I winced, shutting my eyes as she kicked at my rib. A random and painful contraction happening as I bent over the sink, my head near my hands. My stomach felt like a Boulder was inside of it.
"You good?" Brianna asked as she walked in. I nodded, lifting myself up as I looked at her. "Damn bitch you fucking whale. How much does she weigh so far?" Brianna asked as she sat down on the love seat in the middle of the bathroom.
"I don't even know, but she's fucking fat." I say annoyed but joking as Brianna laughs.
"Well lucky you, cause I'm now pregnant too." She said sighing as she slouched down in the love seat. She wore a pair of ripped jeans, white heels, and a white crop top. "Seriously? I thought you and Ski were divorced." I say as she shakes her head.
