to jay, from j • j2

chapter three

Nominations started for prom King and Queen that day and there's so much talk about nominating Jared and the J guy who wants to smash (and no, they aren't just saying that, have you seen the things on Jensen's blog?). It's bothering Jensen because of the whole blog thing, but it's definitely gotten to Jared, and it's obvious when Jensen spots him in math. He's already got his chair pulled up to Jensen's desk, but he's frowning down at his hands, bangs hanging in his eyes, and he doesn't bother brushing them away.

Jensen walks up slow, like approaching a wild animal, and he lowers himself down into his seat. He gives it a couple seconds, chiefly so he can gather the courage to do so, before reaching out and grabbing Jared's hand. They've never done this type of thing, even though Jared's touched him all over (no, not that way you perv, more like lingering touches to the shoulders and arms), and given him hugs (did Jensen forget to mention that this guy gives the best hugs?! It's ridiculous, like he's a big, fluffy teddy bear to bury his face in), and Jensen's a bit surprised with himself for being the one to initiate this kind of interaction.

That's when Jared pulls a deep breath in through his nostrils and exhales slowly through his lips, lifting his head and giving Jensen a smile that doesn't necessarily meet his eyes.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Jensen asks, and as scared as he is about the blog thing, it's impossible to let Jared sit here in such a funk. It's so different from how he normally is, all animated hand gestures and dimpled cheeks, and it tugs on Jensen's heart strings to see him confused and upset.

"It's just this blog thing. I don't-" Jared sighs, shaking his head. "I don't want to take this 'J' guy to prom. He seems really sweet, but I just..."

Before this past Monday, it would have crushed Jensen's heart to hear that. But it doesn't anymore. Jared likes Jensen. Jared's not rejecting him, he's rejecting J. And while that is Jensen and those are Jensen's works, Jared's not aware of that. He knows Jensen and he likes Jensen for who he is. That's more than enough for him. Plus, whose fault is it that Jared doesn't know the true identity of the blogger boy he's rejecting?

"You do what feels best. If it's really eating at you," Jensen tilts his head one way, "then go with J. If you really don't want to," Jensen tilts his head the other way with a small shrug, "then you don't have to. J likes you, doesn't mean you have to take him to prom."

Jared sighs again. "I just feel bad, you know? That J person, he seemed like someone I could really vibe with, but-and this is not how I wanted to say this-I really like you, Jen. And we've only been talking since Monday but I've had my eye on you for so long, and it's my last prom. I wanna take you to prom, not J. He seems great and he would probably be my second choice. But you? I can't pass you up for him. I just can't."

Jensen jerks, swallowing the sharp gasp that works it's way up from his chest. Jared just asked him to prom. Jared fucking Padalecki... asked him... to prom.

Never in a million years would Jensen imagine that Jared would ask him to prom. He doesn't know what to say and he doesn't know how to react, stupidly blinking at him because his mind is like a blank, empty void of space and all his brain cells are powered down, kicking back and enjoying the movie projected through Jensen's eyes. Jared's staring at him now, hope shining bright in his eyes but shadowed with fear and anxiousness. And Jensen wants, he wishes they weren't in this stupid class right now because he wants to kiss Jared like he's never kissed anyone else before (because he hasn't, not seriously), and he's frustrated because he can't.

Okay, he can't leave Jared hanging like this because he's starting to look like that kicked puppy again.

"Oh... it's fine, I-"