Count On Me - Sequel (Laughing into Love)

Chapter 30: The Pain After

There's a knock on Brian's door a couple hours later. He ignores it and just grabs the beer in front of him and chugs it. The knocking continues and after a few minutes he just yells "fuck off!"

The knocking stops but the sound is soon replaced with someone sticking the key into the hole and unlocking his door. He turns with hope, praying he'd see Melanie walk through the door. His hopes are crushed when Sal walks in, a confused look on his face. He takes survey of the damage around the place and assumes the worst. As he walks over towards his friend, he asks "she left?"

"This morning" he spits back. Grabbing another beer from the 6 pack in front of him.

Sal sighs, taking a seat next to his friend "she just needs sometime. You guys will be fine."

Brian corrects him "she left the ring." Sal doesn't have anything to say to his friend, not sure he can console him the way he needs right now. Brian eventually fills the silence with his own words "it's my own damn fault, I fucked up so bad. I just wanted to help her."

He drops his head as Sal speaks back, "I know man, but I don't think it's over for you guys. There's too much there for it to be done."

"All she wants is space. I have to give her that, don't I?" He inquires, needing someone to tell him what he needs to do to fix things.

Sal puts a hand on his friends back "yah dude, you do." Brian releases a huge amount of air and nods twice, never feeling so lost before in his life.

Melanie goes to her apartment but it feels different now. She didn't want to go home, but she wasn't sure where to go. With her moms house being sold and her still being mad at Caroline, she felt lost. She literally had no one. She almost called Sal, but she knew he was Brian's friend first and couldn't put herself between them. As she sits on her bed, feeling the finger where the engagement ring used to sit, she wonders what she's going to do next. Normally she allows herself a day maybe two of sorrow, but she knows this is not going to be that easy. Her heart is broken in so many pieces and she has no one anymore to help her place it back together. That night, she drives back to New Jersey. As she drives past the exit she's gotten off at for years, she finds herself going further and further south. She ends up in Atlantic City, walking the boardwalk and listening to the waves of the ocean in the distance, willing all of her thoughts to exit her head. Even for just an hour. As she stands on the sand, too scared to let the waves touch her feet, she closes her eyes and listens to the waves. Eventually, she can feel herself loosen a little, as if something has washed over her and has taken all of her pain away. Her head falls back and she stares at the night sky, the summer starts glistening between the faint clouds. As she lets whatever this feeling is consume her, it begins to fade away and her pain and sorrow return, her heart beat picking up from fear of having to live with this everyday. She quickly leaves the beach and heads towards the first casino she can find. Melanie stumbles out of the Tropicana, having drank as much alcohol as she could for free the entire night while gambling away all the money she saved over the summer. When she walks out, the sun shines onto her skin and her head bangs within itself "fuckkkkk" she mumbles, stumbling to where she parked her car, finding multiple tickets on the windshield. She grabs them all throws them into her purse. She hops into the drivers seat but before she puts the keys in the ignition, she knows she is way too drunk to drive home. She throws them into the passenger side and climbs into the back of her car. She curls herself together and just cries, cries until she falls asleep.

When she wakes up her head is hurting worse then before. Although she knows she's sober enough to drive, she also knows there's enough alcohol in her system to get her arrested if she was for some reason pulled over. She gets her things together and locks her car up. She walks to a connivence store 3 blocks away and gets herself something for lunch. She chugs some water and heads back to her car, eating some chips. As she sits, she can't help but wish she was anywhere else in the world. Somewhere far away from the pain she is feeling and the desire she has to drive back to Brian's and forgive him for everything. Although her heart is aching to hear his voice and feel the hair on his face, her head knows she'd end up resenting him. Melanie decides something right then and there, not thinking about the logistics of it or how impractical it is. She turns her car on and heads south.