Everything Changes | A Damien Haas Fan-fiction

Chapter Nine: One-Sided and Self-Centered

~~~Sam~~~

After a full day of trying not to think about my best friend in a romantic way, I was exhausted. But it was only Day Two, and I still wanted to hang out with my co-workers and get to know some people, so I made my way back to set where the home theater was set up. The chairs were still there from before, but the equipment was all removed and those who didn't get a chair where sitting on the floor on blankets. In the back row, which only had two chairs in it, sat the girls from the cast. Boze and Courtney were sharing one chair, laying all over each other and Mari and Olivia shared the other one. The front was occupied by Matt Raub, Damien, and Lasercorn, and there were various cast and crew spread out all over the floor  with food and drinks in their hands.

"Oh, hey Sam," Damien called, standing up. "You wanna sit here? I can move."

"That's ok. The floor works for me." I said, walking over and sitting in front of him and beside Shayne. "Thanks though."

"I'll take it if you're offering," Boze spoke up. "I love you Courtney, but I need my space."

"I see how it is. That's fine, I'll just cuddle with Mari and Olivia." She said, draping her legs over the arm rest and into Olivia's lap.

"Yeah, you can have it." Damien said, sliding down on the floor beside me. Because this is exactly what I need. I'm having weird thoughts about my best friend that I've spent all day trying to suppress and now he's sitting right beside me.

"Ok," Matt Raub said, standing up in front of the TV, "After taking an office poll, the movie we are watching tonight is...drumroll please." Everyone began slapping their legs. "Baby Driver!"

Everyone cheered as Matt Raub put the movie in and the previews started. It wasn't until that moment that I had realized that they cranked the AC in the room and it was freezing cold. I like the cold, I prefer cold to hot, but I couldn't hide the fact that by the time the movie started I was shivering and rubbing my arms. I felt a hoodie come down over my shoulders. I looked down at Damien's hoodie and then back at him. He just looked at the screen as if nothing had happened.

"Thanks." I whispered, slipping my arms into the sleeves. He nodded. The hoodie practically swallowed me. It was warm and much to my dismay...it smelled like Damien. It wasn't a bad smell, but I could tell it was cologne. But it wasn't musky like most men's cologne. It smelled clean with a hint of something floral, and despite my best efforts...I loved the smell.

Get your crap together, Sam. Its Day Two. Office romances are a bad idea anyway, let alone with Damien? Ruining your friendship when the relationship inevitably fails because you two are nothing alike? Why the crap are you thinking this way? He touched you twice in a way that wasn't usual for him and now you're sitting here sniffing his hoodie. Why in the world are you thinking like this all of a sudden?

But it wasn't all of a sudden. It was frequent, but suppressed. And it was a lot easier to suppress your feelings for him when you only saw him on special occasions. But now you work with him every day and it only took a total of two days for all those walls you'd built against your feelings to come crashing down? Are you kidding me?

Suddenly, I felt Damien's hand grab mine off of my leg. My eyes flicked to him, snapping me out of my thoughts. Before I could ask what he was doing, his eyes traveled down to my leg. I followed his gaze, seeing the fingernail indents in my skin that probably would have started bleeding had he not pulled my hand away.

"What is up with you?" He whispered. I shook my head.

"I just...I need a minute." I shoved his jacket off of my shoulders and got up, leaving the room and pressing a hand to my forehead. I could hear footsteps trailing after me, but I didn't even have to turn around to know who it was.

"Ok, I can't just ignore this," Damien said, "Digging your nails into your skin? You only do that when something is seriously bothering you. What is going on, Sam?"

"Nothing, Damien! I told you it was nothing!"

"And I know that you're full of crap." He said. It wasn't often that I saw his face as serious and concerned as it was then. He thought it was really something important.  I suddenly felt guilty for making him worry.

That's why this would never work. We're not even together and I've already put him through unnecessary emotional distress worrying about me. He'll worry, I'll lie and always wind up feeling guilty.

"I'm just...stuck in my own head." I told him. "New job, new experiences, it...its a lot to process and its only my second day. Maybe...I don't know, maybe I should've thought this job through a bit more."

"Hey..." He walked forwards, putting his large hands on my arms. They were warm against my chilled skin. "Its normal to be disoriented starting a new job, or really any new experience. But you have to stick around long enough to get used to things. You can't just run away from every unfamiliar thing just because it scares you." I sighed.

"Is this all our friendship is?" I asked, biting my lip. He furrowed his eyebrows. "Gee, Sam has a problem, but she's a private person so she won't say, Damien worries himself sick trying to pry it out of her...I feel like we have the most one-sided, self-centered friendship on the planet." 

His reaction to this wasn't at all what I expected. He smiled. I furrowed my eyebrows, which caused him to chuckle.

"Its not one-sided or self-centered," He said, "I know you'd bee there in"I f an instant if I needed you. And if I'm being honest...it is my honor to worry about you." I rolled my eyes, but couldn't stop the smile that formed on my face. "You are an incredible editor, camera...person, and just a generally great girl...and friend. Don't ever let your mind talk you out of that because most of the time...its lying." I smiled, biting my lip.

"I freaking swear...what would I do without you, Damien Haas?" He smiled.

"Freeze to death." He answered, handing me his sweatshirt back. I gratefully took it from him, putting it back on before stepping forward and wrapping my arms around his neck. His arms wrapped around my waist, and the electrifying feeling was back. It was only intensified as I felt his warm breath on the side of my neck. I pulled away, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"Thank you, for talking me down...again." He smiled.

"No problem. Now lets go watch a baby drive a get-away car which seems...irresponsible." I rolled my eyes, following him back into the room.