Reject (mxm)

Chapter Ten: Ciaran

I glared, waiting for him to continue, because I honestly don't get what he's trying to say. What does he mean I didn't ask?

"Ciaran, you don't shout at someone when you want to know something especially something that important." He said seriously. "You don't command them to tell you. You ask, nicely. Beg if necessary."

Beg? If I had gone down on my hands and knees in front of Ruari, bowed my head to ask who Jean is would he tell me? I doubt it. And I doubt Keiron would let me do such a demeaning gesture. He loves Ruari but probably not enough for him to bow down and grovel.

"What was I supposed to do? He wouldn't tell me who Jean is so I let Keiron do the questioning thinking maybe he could talk some sense into him."

"Another mistake." He pointed out. "From what I saw and heard last night and from what you just told me, I don't think Ruari has a problem with telling you who this Jean person is."

I sat up straighter and eyed him closely. Really?

"If you had asked, like a mature person, he would have told you." Lorcan sounds like he knows what he was talking about. He sounds so convincing. I may appear stupid but I'm fucking new at this so I should be allowed some slack. "He was pissed off because you spied on him. He's keeping quiet about Jean and making you squirm because he's punishing you for not trusting him."

I didn't think of that. Now that my mind's working and I could objectively think back on our conversation, Ruari was more upset when he realized I eavesdropped on his call. I was wrong to do that, I admit, but to punish me by withholding important information that could ease my worries is downright cruel.

Then again this is Ruari we're talking about, a very skittish, fragile and distrustful Ruari. He won't tell me anything if he feels he couldn't trust me. If he has any doubt about my sincerity towards him, even a little, he would choose to watch me rot in hell than save me from a misery of my own making. Damn! I'm so screwed.

"What do I do?" I muttered knocking my forehead on the counter. Maybe if I knock it hard enough I'd find the answers I'm looking for. "He probably hates me now. I really blundered this time."

"Let's focus on one thing at a time. Leave him alone for now. He's still pissed off and it's better to leave him to his thoughts, let some steam out. Let's focus on the council meeting this morning then in the afternoon I'll help you think of a way to get back on his good graces."

I looked at Lorcan and nodded. He has a point. It's not good to keep pushing when Ruari's anger is still fresh on his mind. Better let him cool down a little then attack when there's an opening. For now we regroup and think of another strategy.

Three hours later I'm regretting my decision and cursing Lorcan to hell and back in my mind.

The meeting about the raids was long and intense. The whole council was agitated and everyone's nerves were high strung. It left me physically and mentally exhausted. And since I barely slept, I found the whole episode quite challenging. It's a miracle I made it through without tearing someone's head off.

Then a council member brought up Ruari. Brave of him, really, because Keiron perked up in an instant and made a casual appearance ready to pounce at the man. It took all my remaining energy to hold him back. The man asked when we're thinking of performing the mating ritual reminding me that the full moon is coming up.

I don't think it's anyone's business when I'm planning to mark my mate. But then, I am alpha and my mate might be less dominant but he would also be alpha once we're fully mated. So of course the pack is interested to know when Ruari would take his rightful place and the responsibilities that come with it.