What Lasts in Us

CHAPTER TWENTY ONE

"Did we lose them?" she asked. "Have they left?"

"I can't hear anything," I said after a pause, because now that I'd stopped moving, I could listen for things I'd otherwise miss. I regarded her in the torchlight, at the colour slowly spreading across her cheek. "Are you alright?"

Her hand went to her cheek as I said this. "I'm alright," she said.

I wasn't convinced, but I didn't say anything. I could tell just by the way she was standing that she'd hurt her foot or her ankle. I wasn't sure when, but it was before I'd come outside. She'd tried to conceal it, but even now she wasn't doing a very good job of it. She leaned heavily against the side of the plane and bore no weight on her left side.

Her silence was surprising. I was waiting for her to say something, maybe a snide remark; but she offered nothing. Give it five seconds and I knew she'd crack the shits.

"I'm going to leave you here," I began, and just like that, she was back to herself; it was like watching a flower bloom before my eyes. "I'm going to leave you here, then I'm coming back," I said over her protests.

"Nathan Tarver, you are not leaving me behind!" she said indignantly. I was pleasantly surprised she knew my last name – Emmi must've told her. "I'm going with you."

"No."

"You can't stop me."

"Considering you can't even walk, I won't need to."

She was ready to go down fighting – I was actually waiting for her to get physical, like the many other times we'd clashed. But she changed again, like she was closing in on herself. It was odd against what I knew of her, to see her close up, to see her so subdued. Usually she was so full of life, energy, and was ready to grab life by the balls – literally.

"Don't leave me behind," she said, and her voice lowered to a whisper. "Don't leave me here."

It was hard to get a read on her. Was she actually scared? Did she fear Jai – that he'd find her and take her away?

"I'm going back for Emmi," I said.

Saying her name was like a lightbulb going off. But it didn't make Charlotte see reason like I'd hoped; instead it made her latch onto me, like I was about to take off. Her fingers anchored themselves into my jacket. "You are not fucking leaving me here," she said, and I swore if I tried to move away she'd grab my leg.

When it came to Emmi, there was no other choice. And besides, Charlotte was safer here than anywhere else. The cockpit of the plane looked like it could still be closed. She was armed, and if someone tried to get at her she was protected. And she could protect herself. She was fucking capable – I'd seen it firsthand.

I handed Charlotte her pack. She silently and reluctantly let go of me as she accepted it. "You're safer here," I said to her, but she looked unconvinced.

She dropped the bag at her feet before removing my rifle from her shoulders. "Fine," she said, tossing me my weapon. I caught it with one hand, which only seemed to irritate her more. "Go get your daughter. Come back to me before I die."

"Charlotte–"

"Don't. You've made up your mind, I've made up mine. I'll wait here like a sitting duck."

She was past the point of reason. So I approached her, grabbed her chin and kissed her on the mouth while she was preoccupied.

She looked both horrified and wounded by the gesture. "Don't," she said so quietly I thought she hadn't said anything at all. Then she said, "Go", and I left, taking off toward the farmhouse as fast as I could.