The Kids Aren't Alright

Chapter 53: Finn

"I didn't try shouting because I knew that it would just make Clancey angrier," I reply, ignoring his jab. I don't have to explain myself to Ronan; I don't have to explain myself to anybody. "Like you said, all I ever do is make things worse."

"Spare me the self-pity, Fish. You know I didn't mean it like that."

"Then how did you mean it?"

He sneers at me. "Whatever."

"'Whatever'? What kind of answer is that?"

"An honest one. Did you want an essay?"

Frustration wells up in my throat, but I force myself to swallow it back down. The bobbing motion of my Adam's Apple makes the fresh cut on my neck flare with pain. "Fine. Keep being a dick. We have more important things to worry about— like how Clancey still has Owen's knife."

Ronan starts laughing like a maniac. "You mean this knife?" He sticks his hand under the pillow, and when he pulls it out, he's holding the same knife Clancey stole from Owen. "Did you really think I'd let him keep it? He'd skewer us both in our sleep."

"Fuck," I breathe. I've done a lot of shit that could get me kicked out of camp, but stealing a knife from a counselor— that's on an entirely different level. We could get slammed with real criminal charges for this. "You've got to get rid of that."

"Hell, no. This is part of the plan."

"The plan?" I repeat, my voice rising an octave. "Ronan, if somebody caught you with that, you could go to jail. This camp is the last chance for us! You know how the counselors are— they assign punishments first and ask questions later."

"Only if they catch me."

I decide to go for the low blow. "Ronan, you can't afford to be this reckless. Think about your mother. Think about what she said to you—"

"Don't you ever bring up my mother. Ever."

"You really think that tough-guy act is gonna work on me? I know what your mother said to you before you left, you told it to me yourself. If you get in trouble at Lightlake, she'll disown you. And, in my opinion, stealing a knife from a counselor is a one-way ticket to getting in trouble."

"Good thing I didn't ask for your opinion, then." Ronan looks angry now, really angry. His eyes are pitch-black. No pupils. "I don't care what I told you. My family is none of your business."

"I'm just trying to protect you."

"I don't need your protection, especially not from my own mother. Just stay out of it."

"Ronan, I—" I can't finish even finish my sentence, I'm so frustrated with him. "I'm worried about you, okay?"

"I know how to handle myself."

"Really? And what are you gonna do if you get kicked out of Lightlake and don't have a home to go back to?"

"I'll figure something out."

"Like what? You're sixteen, Ronan. You don't have an infinite number of options right now. We have to think realistically here. All that money you have in your duffel bag is gonna run out real quick on the street, and then what are you gonna tell your family? Your friends? What about Jesse?"

Ronan turns his face away from me. I think I might hear him sniff, but that's probably just my mind playing tricks on me. "I don't want to see Jesse ever again."

"That's bullshit and you know it. Just because you had one fight doesn't mean that your friendship is over—"

"Finn, please stop talking. Really. I don't want to hear it. I'm sure that you have good intentions telling me all of this, but I'm not in the mood."