Choni- I get what I want

Chapter 14-Mother says no

WHAT... NO FUCKING WAY! Is this me? Posting another chapter after only just one day? ... Nah it cant be.

Oh wait ... but it is though.

Her hands still tightly gripping the girls wrist she froze, just for a second. Then she kissed back. So urgently and forcefully she kissed back letting go of  Cheryl's wrists letting them fall at her sides and moving her hands to her face.
Well she got her hands off her for a second atleast ...so not a total fail.

Cheryl wasn't thinking, wasnt moving away but most of all she wasn't stopping.
Toni pushed her against the wall causing the readhead to lift her hands and place them on the girls hips.
The kiss became heated fast ... way too fast. As their hands roamed eachothers bodies mindlessly and eagerly thier lips stayed connected and any coherent thought was pushed far back into the depths of thier brains.

Then Toni pulled back shocked at what was happening but in no rush to make it stop. So, a second later her lips were trailing across Cheryl's jaw and then attached to her neck.
Queen bee sighed into it almost letting out a slight moan at the connection.

This was apparently enough for Toni to push into her body and continue while cheryl rose her hands to tangle them in Toni's hair and push her head down.
She nibbled slightly at at the girls ear, causing cheryl to bite her lip in anticipation, before returning to her neck and lightly sucking.
And this ... this was apparently enough to shock Cheryl back into reality. Within seconds her eyes widened, she had pushed Toni off her and she slid down the wall breathing heavily and again the panic set in.

It took her a few seconds but Toni blinked hard and watched as cheryl did this. The breif pause from panic was short-lived and now all she could do was breathe heavily and remain motionless.
She breathed again holding her head as if to try and steady herself after that ... that moment.
And then she looked down at Cheryl and for the first time ever ... instead of seeing a fiery, fearless, chaotic monster she saw ... something fragile, so broken and fragile, so ...not Cheryl.
And she froze. Again.

The girl was jittery her voice shaking as she muttered words to herself
"Wrong, no, stop it stop, mother says" Cheryl seemed so genuinely broken and unable to think straight.
Toni snapped out of her state when she zoned into what cheryl was saying.
She instantly dropped to her knees infront of Cheryl and spoke
"Hey hey Cheryl" she tried to, as hard as it was, drop her voice to a soft and calm tone.
"No no" tears were streaming violently down her face now and she frantically wiped them away with shaky hands only to be met with an ocean more "stop it" her eyes flickered as if she was literally seeing the memories that was plaguing her mind on a screen infront of her.
"Cheryl" she reached for her hands to try and subdue her.
"Get off no! Stop it mother says st-" Toni instantly moved her hands back in surrender respecting the girls wishes and then moving to sit beside her.
She leant back on the wall a look of genuine concern and sadness plastered across her face watching Cheryl.
She felt helpless. A minute ago she was in a position she strangly enough loved, and now she sat hating the fact that she had no idea how to stop Cheryls pain.
She couldn't just watch so instead she thought rationally then turned to the panic striken redhead.

"Cheryl" Toni tried once more. She breathed in lightly and slowly moved her hand to touch her arm.
Cheryl whipped her head around incredibly fast, looked at Tonis hand then her face then her hand again.
Toni just nodded giving a half smile and trailing her hands along cheryl's arm towards her hand.

Cheryl stared at Toni, her breath still heavy and fast with a few stray tears still sliding down her cheeks.

And Toni did her best to just look comforting, if that was even a thing. She was not good in these situations but Cheryl really seemed to need her to be in this moment so she did the best she could. Its not like Cheryl was in a ideal situatiom either.

"It's okay Cheryl" she reached the girls hand and interlocked thier fingers together not breaking eye contact.
Cheryls breathing slowed
"No" she she spoke lightly between sobs. It was the only word she could muster up right now.
Everything had happened so fast, moved so quickly that when her brain and its thoughts finally caught up to her actions her mind went into overload.
A panic attack. She was no stranger to one.
A severe panic attack. She had only had a few and the last time was a very similar situation.

Only this time the girl that witnessed it stayed. She was not pushed away by anyone and did not leave herself. Instead here she was next to the girl not making any attempt to leave and not panicking herself either.
Toni ignored her.
"No" cheryl shook her head this time.
"Yes" Toni said. Again she tried with every particle in her body to sound non threatening and calm.
She squeezed her hand slighlty. Breathing in and out slowly repeating calmly "breathe in and out" to her.

"Its wrong" Cheryl breathing became slower and begun to steady itself.
"It doesnt have to be" Toni scrunched her eyebrows this time with sympathy and sadness.
"It already is" she took one last large breath and threw her head back leaning it against the wall and closing her eyes.
But as she did this she squeezed Toni's hand back lightly but just enough for the girl to notice.
And she did.

They both sat leaning back, hands interlocked, arms grazing  and thier breathing matching just trying to both remain sane in this moment.