Struck by Lightning

6. I'm Not Crazy

Thursday

Freddie: I've finished your story. The nurse listening in was pretty emotional

Amanda: Oh no, really?

Yep, it was intense but I loved it! I'm sure Louisa did too

I'm glad. I've eaten everything you sent me by the way. It's the best I've eaten in months, if not ever

I'll send more?

Only if you let me pay this time. It's too much to give away

Payment can just be continuing to talk to me

I would do that anyway, regardless of you sending the food

Would you?

Yes

Good. Look, I've been wondering... if you wanted to meet up in person at the weekend. Just get a coffee? As friends

No

Just coffee. No different to us talking like this really. The kids will be at their grandparents. I know you're not feeling so great, but we don't need to go far from yours. And we don't need to stay out for long. Just whatever you feel like

That's really nice of you. But I'm just not leaving the house right now - I'm working from home a lot

Maybe it would do you good then? I don't know what's wrong, but maybe just a walk in the park instead of a coffee?

Can I think about it?

Sure

***

Friday

Freddie: How are you feeling about tomorrow? Want to go out?

Amanda: Not really. It would kind of be weird seeing you after all the intimate conversations we've been having!

I don't think it will. I feel like I know you. We've had fantasy-sex many times now

Yeah, that's what makes it weird!

It'll be fine. Shall I come and pick you up? What time?

11 am?

Great, see you tomorrow

***

Amanda felt sick Saturday morning, her nerves getting the better of her. It was so easy to talk to Freddie behind a screen, but she imagined it would be awkward in person. He'd said 'as friends', but their conversations had been far from friendly. If his wife ever woke up and read their back and forth messages she would be outraged. Seeing him in person, even if just 'as friends', was a terrible idea.

And she desperately didn't want to leave the house. The last time had been her trip to the doctor and that had been out of necessity. She also had to properly get dressed that morning, which she didn't want to do. Choosing an outfit was a decision she could do without.

She sat on the floor in her bedroom removing the three-day-old eye make-up so she could reapply it. Once she was satisfied with that, she sprayed some dry shampoo over her hair. Underneath was so long and tangled she swore it was turning into dreadlocks. She almost laughed at her reflection as she realised what a let-down she was going to be to the gorgeous, successful Frederick Young.

She wished she'd never agreed to this stupid meet-up. What was the point of it anyway? What did they talk about if not sex?

Getting up from sitting down always made Amanda feel lightheaded, so she hauled herself up from in front of the mirror at 10:50 a.m. and stayed on her feet, wandering around the empty house for ten minutes, her fingers brushing the patterned walls and mahogany door frames, while she waited anxiously for the doorbell to ring.