Protect (Taekook) ✅

His Fault

“How is he?” Jungkook was holding Taehyung’s hand, and he slowly looked up, his eyes so full of sadness as he looked upon Soyeon.

“Still the same.” He replied sadly. The woman sighed and leaned down, patting Jungkook on the back reassuringly.

“He'll wake up. He’ll be fine, it’s okay, Jungkook.”

“I-it’s not. I-I thought he was okay! How could I not see it?” Jungkook cried out, covering his mouth as he muffled a fresh round of sobs making its way to his throat. He couldn’t handle it. How could he not have noticed how much Taehyung had actually been hurting? He should have done more.

He should have been there for Taehyung, he should have hugged him more, kissed him more, done more. He should have paid more attention to him, taken him on more dates, asked him if he was okay.

But he did none of those things. He’d been so fucking distracted by work and Soyeon and everything else. Ashamed. He was ashamed and guilt ridden and he should be. He should wallow in these feelings because he was to blame, it was all his fault. He should suffer because of it, continue to suffer like he was now.

All of these thoughts were coursing through Jungkook’s mind about how he should’ve done better to prevent this, how he should’ve treated Taehyung better, how he should have loved the man more.

He shook his head sadly, looking down and biting his lower lip, willing him to stop crying. He’d already shed enough tears, and he didn’t want to shed anymore.

“Come on. He’s not going anywhere, Jungkook, and you need to shower. Eat. You haven’t moved from that spot for days.” Soyeon said gently. “Come on.”

Jungkook hesitantly stood, allowed Soyeon to lead him from the hospital room and getting him to the bathroom, telling him to take a shower and that she would get him a new pair of clothes.

Jungkook showered slowly, letting the hot water hit his back as he rubbed some hospital soap into his skin. He stared blankly at the wall in front of him, just soaking in everything once more. He was still in shock. Still unable to get the image of Taehyung, laying in the bathroom, dead.

Dead.

No…

No, he wasn’t dead.

But he almost was.

He might as well have been.

Jungkook squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head as he released a shaky breath, unable to come to terms with it. He couldn’t accept it.

He couldn’t accept the fact that Taehyung had been driven to a point that he decided he would rather be dead than live. He didn’t want to accept it, he couldn’t.

Because it was all his fault.

He knew, deep down that it was all his fault and that he was to blame. Taehyung lying on that bed, pale and unmoving was his fault and he didn’t know how to wrap his head around it.

A knock sounded through the bathroom, suddenly breaking Jungkook from his never ending, spiral of thoughts. “Kookie? I have some clothes for you. Can I come in?” Jungkook swallowed thickly, before nodding.

“Yeah.” His voice sounded foreign to him when he spoke. So thick with emotion and full of unshed tears. He sounded weak.

He heard the door open and the shuffled of some clothing being set down. “I ordered some lunch for us, too. But I made a reservation. I think it’d be best if you spent some time out of the hospital, Kookie.”

Jungkook didn’t respond this time, merely shut the shower off and waited for the door to close before stepping out. He dried himself off and dressed slowly, taking less than two minutes to dry his hair and not even caring how unkempt and out of place it looked.

He exited the bathroom to find Soyeon standing there, looking solemn. “Come on, Kookie. I think it’ll do you some good to get out.”

Jungkook glanced at Taehyung once more before walking out of the room and following Soyeon out of the hospital where Taehyung had been moved. He got into her car and they drove to a nice little restaurant, being seated immediately.

“What would you like?” Soyeon asked, turning to Jungkook. But the male only shrugged, uninterested. The woman sighed, reaching over and clapping her hands over his. “Come on, Kookie.”

“Thank you…” Jungkook finally whispered. “Thank you for being here with me and comforting me. Thank you for being my friend and not hurting me, Soyeon. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I care a lot for you, I just want you to know that.”

Soyeon cracked a small smile. “Anything for you, Kookie.” She said softly, smiling at him as if everything was fine.