To the White Wolf | Fenrys (ToG)

Chapter 11: Don't Leave Me

Ten Months later

I had kept myself busy in Rifthold. I moved into a room in the Torre as I learned and helped patients. I made friends there and experienced going to classes for the first time. My mother had tutored me as a child at home, so going to classes and learning beside others was a new and exciting difference. I even helped rebuild the Royal Garden like I had told Dorian.

Every day I visited my mother. It was one of the hardest things I had ever done, telling her what happened to me. She had cried for days after I told her, had barely ate, and lack of sleep showed on her face. But I reassured her over and over that I was alive because of her.

That day the guards came after us, they had chased her into the forest and she had changed into a doe as soon as she made it through the trees. When she tried to come back to look for me, she said she couldn't change back. Her magic was gone and she was stuck as a deer for over a decade.

She said as soon as her magic returned she asked about me. She looked through the records of fae deaths, she asked about The Deviney. She met with the same captain she had paid for passage and he told her I never made it on board. She thought I had died.

I also got close with my youngest half-brother. Holland oddly looked up to me and followed me around whenever I came to the castle. Dorian would invite me to nights of sitting around drinking and playing games and Holland would try to invade and whine because I apparently only wanted to spend time with the adults.

Meeting Manon, the Queen of Witches, was a pleasure as well. She terrified me but I enjoyed the fear I felt around her. It was a thrill to be around someone that could eat me but decided not to, an honor actually. She liked to joke that if I pissed her off, she would drink my blood. She also liked to sneak up on me with her nails out. I almost zapped the shit out of her once when I had too much to drink and she jumped out at me after I used the bathroom.

Yrene and I became close friends. I watched little Josie for her sometimes and she told me everything. Chaol was the third wheel sometimes and would sigh when the two of us would giggle at something we found funny. She was easy to get along with and we shared the same humor. I also liked spending time with her and Josie and making them laugh. Hopefully Josie learns to call me Aunt.

I loved it. I was home. But something was missing that left my heart feeling hollow even when I was surrounded by joy and love.

After a long week of tending to patients and tests, I decided to take a break and go to a ball. I fixed my hair into soft waves on the way to the castle in the carriage. My mother watched me nervously pick at them.

"You look lovely, my dear." She smiled.

I took an anxious breath. We were almost there and I was all dressed and ready. I tapped my feet to shake out the jitters.

My mother sat calmly across from me. She was in a deep green dress and looked flawless despite her lack of trying. She had a wild beauty to her all fae had, as if one foot was still stuck in the forest.

We pulled up to the castle and a guard opened the door and held out a hand for me to accept. I thanked him and stepped out, marveling the beautiful castle as it glowed in the darkness of the night.

It was rude of me, but I didn't wait for my mother. I was too anxious. My heart was beating faster as I entered the palace. Guards greeted me, some by name, and I nodded to them all. I followed the upbeat music preparing myself for this ball.

The party had already began. People danced and I spotted familiar faces, but they didn't see me. I blended in with the crowd and moved through the people, searching.